the naive inner-workings of a bubbly 20something

tieing the knot

2009-09-11T13:23:00.000-07:00

so yours truly (returning from a much anticipated hiatus) is getting ready to get hitched...yup, the eternal self-proclaimed bachelor is getting ready to become a "we"...no longer, I, rather "us"...or "we'll..." or "i'll have to check with my better half..." People will no longer refer to me as simply "Joey"...it'll be a package deal; Joey and Adrian!

wow...even i sometimes have a hard time believing it...which is probably a societally-orchestrated thought, seeing as how there's that old wives tale that 'gays' don't...correction, "aren't allowed" to get married in today's world. well i'm here to tell ya'll that that previously believed idea doesn't stand to be true anymore! gay couples can now officially hold the same legal rights as all straight married couples! it doesn't have as catchy a title as the "husband/wife" regime adopted by all those straighties...ours is simply refered to as "civil partners"! which i'm totally ok with!!

adrian; the gent in question, is the one that has continuously saved me from myself since we've met... he lives a life much unlike my own; one that isn't plagued by a strict exercise regime , an obsession with routine, or the inability to relax and let the mind rest...

i guess some could call him my rock...well at least he would be if he knew how to handle me when i'm in one of my notoriously troubling moods... that he's still trying to figure out...for if he had then i wouldn't probably be sitting here at my computer on a friday night alone (well with the dogs) while he's out celebrating with "my" friends, while i pine away loathing the fact that he and carolyn were able to remove themselves from the situation that has forced me to stay in for the night, and leave me alone to deal with my own demons...

prepare for my rant:

i mean shouldn't he know by now what i NEED when i get like this???? shouldn't he know that i need someone to just not talk or nag me, but to yell at me and tell me to fuck off and just grab me and hold me until i'm over it...

but no... he doesn't know this yet, in fact sometimes i worry he doesn't know enough about me...i worry that maybe he is just in love with the idea of me...not really knowing what's underneath, or bothering to take the time to really look at what's there...perhaps for fear of finding out...haha, let's hope not... *nervous laughter*

maybe i'm the one who's afraid of him really finding out what's there...for fear he'll run screaming for the hills...

but then i erase this thought from my mind since i pride myself on being a very honest and open person...if i were able to fake the way i feel then i would be at that party right now, and not sitting here at my computer talking to you... so i guess it's not a total loss!!

i do have worries about getting married...i think that maybe if we didn't 'have' to be doing this, then...no, you know what? i don't think that...i do love him, with all my heart, and i do actually enjoy the fact that i don't know everything there is to know about him, and that he doesn't know everything there is to know about me...i think that part of the fun of being in a relationship is finding out more and more about your partner, and exploring who they are...

if all the mystery was gone after the first month, then what is there left to discover?

and so here i sit...thinking, and mulling, and stewing in a pot of my own guilt and frustration...wishing and hoping that the one that stands there before me can be the one to pull me out...

shhhhh

2009-03-27T15:11:00.000-07:00

i've always been quite intrigued by sex and those who really put it out there...

our society has built somewhat of a stigma around sex, and those who build their life around it...forcing it underground, and out of sight, where the term "seedy" takes over like some sort of excuse.

yet behind closed doors, even the worlds elite are doing it...and worse off, they're probably the ones that get their rocks off in the most "naughtiest" of ways...and subsequently they scoff those who are the most honest about their carnal desires...

doesn't that seem a tad bit hypocritical to anyone else???

i think that's why i have an obsession with porn, and strippers (love you jenna), because this is probably the most honest industry in the whole world, existing with practically nothing to hide, and purely there for our enjoyment...isn't that what sex is all about?

to turn our noses up at the girls who need to "dance" to make a living, yet then go out on saturday night and pick up a random to satisfy that burning desire we possess to not be alone...is the saddest thing i could possibly imagine...

who are we to judge?

that thing...

2009-03-27T14:20:00.000-07:00

so i have always believed that everybody has their own little kinks...some that we don't always want to share with people, and others that we love to flaunt and have exposed for the raw kinks that they are...

but no matter how vanilla or raunch your specific kink is, does that make it wrong? is there a level of kinkiness that deems some to be acceptable, and others not??

i recently "came out" to carolyn with the prospect of a new "kink" of mine, and let's just say she was less than "ok" with it...k, now wait; it had nothing to do with her...well at least not directly, anyways... and she was very quick to judge...to say the least...

what gives people the right to judge the factors that get us off?? who allows them the permission to view our kinks as taboo, yet their own as totally acceptable??

shouldn't we all just accept our dirrty little secrets for what they are, and move on? especially between friends...what's it to them, really??

am i right??

faces

2009-02-15T11:57:00.000-08:00

i was talking with christina tonight about how facebook has revolutionized dating; isn't it odd how friends used to find out about a new relationship through actual voice-on-voice phone calls from one party to the other...but since the days of facebook all one has to do to tell everyone about their new found happiness is to change their "relationship status" on their home page!!

i mean, i've said it before and i'll say it again; what did the world do before facebook?????

we used to have to reveal our secrets to the world one phone call at a time...now all it takes is a 2 second posting on one of the most popular networking sites of all time, and within moments all of your "friends" are aware of the new developments in your life!!!

you can put it down all you want, but there's no denying the usefulness of facebook and all it's applications!

why waste your time making the obligatory phonecalls to all of your loved ones to notify them of your news; let facebook do it for you!

xx

what made you

2009-02-01T07:17:00.001-08:00

one of my favourite questions i get asked the most often since i've been here in england, is "what made you decide to come to the UK"?

at first i didn't think too much about my answer, (it was time to come over here; i was done with canada/the US; always wanted to live in/visit europe) or their motives behind asking...until the 100 000 time that very same question was posed.

then it got me thinking; if i met someone in canada who had just moved there from the UK, i would probably have asked them the same thing!!

what is it about the area we're from that is always less appealing to us than it is to someone who's never been before?

i always thought that those who live somewhere fabulous like london, would love london!! but i've come to find that there are loads of natives to this gorgeous land, who can no longer see it's appeal. and it would be the same with canada; i can not think of one genuine reason why someone would want to leave somewhere like england to migrate to somewhere in canada (aka the land of the endless winters)...

i suppose the old saying "the grass is always greener" rings true in this situation, doesn't it? when we're standing in the same pasture we've stood in for our whole lives, the thought of going somewhere else outside of the familiar (no matter what the downfalls) will always have it's appeal...

Red Carpet Suicide

2009-01-31T12:03:00.000-08:00

well my darling Perez Hilton, otherwise known as the gossip gangster, has recently published his (first of hopefully many) books, appropriately titled "Red Carpet Suicide".

it's basically his daily blog reformatted to fit into a 250 page book, where he dishes more dirt, and comments on the awesome world of "the famous".

being somewhat biased to him already; i read his column as often as amy winehouse smokes crack, i knew his book would be above amazing!! and as i dove head first into it the second amazon.co.uk delivered it to my door, i realized my aforementioned predictions were true!

i've always been impressed by this man's wit and poignant point of view, and this book does not disappoint.

but the main reason to pick up his book is because he offers up an explanation to the worlds fascination with celebrities. focusing mainly on the reasons behind why certain starlets become famous for absolutely no reason, he attempts to shed some light on just why we have allowed celebrities to rule the world, with us hanging off of their every move.

i think my favourite part thus far is his forward that was written by andy warhol (from heaven) that focuses on his infamous quote that "in the future, everyone will be world famous for 15 minutes". and if take a gander at the tabloids these days, you'll see andy's prediction brought to life, right before your eyes...

check it out!

someone different

2009-01-23T11:05:00.000-08:00

i recently have found myself extremely attracted to a type of person i didn't know i could have feelings for.

isn't that interesting? now i never considered myself to be someone who even had a "type"; i've dated/slept with people of different shapes and sizes, colours, ages, nationalities, backgrounds, jobs, etc; and have always found myself to be quite versatile when it comes to men.

i am attracted to warmth, charisma, confidence, and a killer personality. and recently have found myself quite intrigued by the idea of being with someone so completely opposite from not only myself, but from those men who make up my tattered past!

perhaps it's the universe throwing me a bone, (and hopefully a boner!!) perhaps meeting someone so completely different from the one i thought i'd end up with, is exactly the way it's sepposed to be!

maybe having me believe that i thought i always knew what i wanted, was the plough all along...only to have me be completely thrown and surprised by the direction my hormones have led me!!

fasten your seatbelts

some people

2009-01-23T10:48:00.000-08:00

so people in the past have been somewhat intrusive sometimes when it comes to MY 'blogging rules'; those being that this is MY blog, and i shouldn't have to apologize for anything i say on here at ANY time...no matter who i offend in the blogging process.

but lately, there have been a few occasions when i have offended a certain 'someone' (in particular) with my opinions/feelings that i've posted on here, and thusly ended up feeling guilty for it.

but aren't blogs just like an online diary; one that is available for everyone to see?!?! if someone read something about themselves they didn't like in your PERSONAL PRIVATE diary, that person would have no one to blame but themselves for their invasion of YOUR privacy...so is an online diary really any different???

i mean it's not like you FORCED them to read it, right???? they could just have not logged on to your page, and no one would have been the wiser!

but simply because they made a decision(their own, might i add) to log on, and happened to read something they didn't feel so great about, suddenly I'M the one to blame???

well i hereby revoke YOUR right to read my blog, as i've done to others in the past...if you have received a personal invitation in the past to log on to this page, consider this a rebuttal. i shouldn't have to bow down to anyone regarding the content about what i write about; i didn't stop writing dirty entries when i found out my mom read this, and i certainly don't intend to stop expressing myself the way i please, just because some people can't handle it...

deal with it.

Lady Gaga live in London (G-A-Y Heaven 17/01/2009)

2009-01-19T14:01:00.001-08:00

she's fuckin' brilliant; and put on a rockin' show! i'm obsessed!! xx

true lies

2009-01-16T13:52:00.000-08:00

have you ever told a lie so many times over, that you start to believe it?

so many times, that this lie starts to become a part of who you are, and you start to forget where the truth ends, and the lie begins?

there's been something, nothing ground-breakingly important...fear not, but something that started out as somewhat of an "embellishment" and sort of snowballed into a full blown big-fat-fuckin' lie!!

every time i tell it, i think to myself; WHY ARE YOU SAYING THIS AGAIN????? but it's almost as if since i started saying it i can't seem to stop...

but isn't that what lying is all about? it's addictive, and once you start you just can't stop...and before you know it, you're telling it to everyone...whether you consciously do it or not...

but here's the hard part; how do you stop? once something has been engrained in your brain to the point where it's almost automatic, how do you put a halt to it? and worst of all...if found out, how do you recover from it?

AND NOW FOR SOMETHING TOTALLY ADHD AND COMPLETELY OFF TOPIC; what the fuck is up with people who can't handle what they feel????

is it an age thing? are younger lads just completely unable to handle and deal with their emotions????? a word to the wise, and to a certain someone in particular: when something you know you shouldn't be feeling gets the best of you...learn how to fuckin deal with it!!!!!!!!! don't be a pussy about it; just put it out there and decide what your heart/head is telling you...and react...

fuck

New Year

2009-01-03T11:16:00.000-08:00

well i'm not usually one for making resolutions come the new year...not because i don't agree with the idea of them, but simply because i don't believe in making one that i don't intend to stand by.

however, as january 1st (2009) inched it's way closer and closer, i found myself evaluating my whirlwind year that was 2008 and thinking about the things i'd like to have done differently.

now those of you who know me, know that i don't believe in regrets...i accept the things i have done incorrectly, and simply learn from them and move on.

so as i look back at the mistakes of the past 365 days, i have come to 3 "so-called-new-years-resolutions" that i feel will help me to make this year even more bitchin' than the last!!

the first thing i take upon myself this year is the desire to continue to live as healthily as i possibly can. this past year i decided to turn vegan, but then realized that i wasn't getting as many nutrients as i should be. i felt myself losing weight, which is something i never wanted to do, so i have returned to my vegetarian roots...where i feel the most happy with myself! besides what i eat, i simply want to listen to the angel on my shoulder who tells me what i should and should not be putting in my body. now don't get me wrong, i love's me my red wine and won't be giving that up anytime soon...but those of you who've been partying with me over the holidays know about the poisons that i wish to now stray from...for good.

the second thing i want for myself this year is to not be afraid to get close to another person in a relationship again...i have had quite a tumultous past in the "boy department"...going from full blown whore status, to my now unrequited "lover-not-a-fighter-waiting-for-his-Edward-to-come-along"...status? i'm not even sure that is a status...but that's where i'm at right now...my "tattered past" of which i spoke before has left me with a sadness that i can't seem to shake when it comes to commitment...i always said i'd never be one of those bruised lovers who can't get past the break-ups and the heartaches that has left them feeling less than whole time and time again...but alas i still carry with me the baggage of those break ups...even though i'm getting back to my good ol' self with each sunny day! but this year i hope to let go of those negative vibes that are holding me back from getting closer to someone and really letting them into my psyche...for relationships are all about taking risks...and not being afraid of putting themselves into the crossfire!

lastly, as i step full-on into 2009, still reaping the drawbacks of the most expensive christmas of my life, the third thing i resolve to do this year is to be aware and more conscious of how i spend my earnings...i love having things to show for my hard work, and i feel over the past few months...namely because of my crazy xmas...i haven't had a lot gained over as i dive into my overdraft...and in 2009 i vow to change all that. now that doesn't mean that i intend to not shop anymore...pbbbt~do you not know me at all??? it just means that i intend to spend my money more wisely on those lovely items at topman, and not so much on those other 'highs' that don't last nearly as long!! as i get ready to turn 28 this year, i refuse to be ruled by debt, and promise to be much more conscious of how i save.

so to those of you who i missed over the holidays, i bid you the best! 2009 has begun with a fuckin' bang, and i hope you are all looking forward, as much as i am, to more galavanting, random wine soaked nights with friends, good times, great flicks, good teaching days, amazing walks with doggies, and those quiet evenings when all you wanna do is curl up with a good book on your coach, and just stay in...mmmm!!

Joe Rogan vs Jenna Jameson

2008-12-27T07:20:00.001-08:00

something i came across that i got a kick outta; my girl jenna giving joe rogan (from fear factor status) tips on how to eat a woman out...ahem...

A Very Unusual Christmas

2008-12-26T11:32:00.000-08:00

just a little something for you all during this holiday season...to keep you warm, that is! ahem...

well lovers, i hope you all had an amazing christmas!! what did ya'll do? well whatever you naughty little elves got up to, i hope you indulged until your heart's content! for what else is there to really do in december, but eat too much, drink loads, visit with the rellies (relatives) and just have a holly jolly time?!?!

well don't be sad for me lovers, but i did all of these typical christmas activities, except for visit with the relatives...yes, it's true, i had the xmas of someone who's been living abroad for the past year, and was unable to return to the land from which he was conceived due to extreme costs...

but alas, all was not a disappointment! i made the decision to take my jet to the beach for a few days where we spoiled ourselves rotten by staying in a posh little hotel, ordering room service, sleeping in a king size bed, drinking champagne, and just enjoying life!!

the only thing missing was...YOU!

which is what made this xmas so unusual...waking up on xmas morning and not having my parents to make me my coffee and baileys, was odd...to say the least.

bad? no...just unusual...but as with every passing christmas, we inevitably grow up more and more, and the traditions we grew accustomed to change and develop, and we in turn make our own new traditions, and abandon others! so what may seem like a sad way to spend xmas to some, suited me just fine!

i'm 27 now, and the true meaning of christmas, well the one that i thought was the true one anyways, has evolved as i've grown up...i no longer feel the need to wake up on the 25th of december with a tree full of presents...

at this point, christmas is about doing what makes you happy! seeing the ones that make you happy! and appreciating the season! so that's why jet and i did what we did, cause if we couldn't be with my parentals this christmas, i would at least spoil us both rotten and have our holly jolly christmas somewhere i love, doing the things that make us happy...

happy christmas lovers!!!

now bring on fuckin' NEW YEARS EVE!!!!!!!!!!!!

EVERYTHING NEW IS BETTER...

2008-12-20T11:40:00.000-08:00

well just a little introduction to the newly revamped, much improved, gotta-read-daily, more-important-to-your-routine-than-logging-onto-perezhilton.com, blog of yours truly!!!!

it has been a while, but alas as sometimes occurs in even the most "together" situations, the one you have come to rely upon gets busy...and begins slacking off on his postings...

as i'm sure you've heard it all before, let's hope that this promise to tune you all in more often, does not fall upon deaf ears!

it's funny when you think about it; writing has always been a true joy of mine...i've always found some sort of solace in putting my thoughts out there...whether on paper, or online...why would i allow something that brings me such peace, slip away like i have??? why do we all allow the things that bring us down, take such precidence over the things that make us happy??

i think there comes a time when we all have to stop and take a look at our priorities, and decide how important we want such negative things to really be in our day-to-day lives...and how much attention we decide to pay to them on a daily basis.

i'm 27 years old...my late (pardon me) twenties...no longer will i allow that which makes me happy fall to the wayside...and i urge you all to do the same!

if somethings important enough that it brings you up when you're down, then you not only need to indulge in it...you need to fuckin' BATHE in it!!!!

xx

2008-08-28T12:37:00.000-07:00

SUMMER OF...

(a little late, i know but better now than never!!) British boys, London, Brighton, Camden, Notting Hill, SOHO, gay clubs, the return of Electro, checkered prints, "footie", star tattoos, pooches flying overseas to be reunited with their fathers, living off your overdraft, finding out bad things from someone you really like, red red wine, British boys, mixmag, lady gaga, ava leigh, rihanna's "disturbia", alphabeat, "pjanoo", pete tong, carl cox, tiesto, hed kandi, katie price and peter andre, summer beach reads, having rocks on the beach instead of sand, summer "halifax" flatmates, blogs being revisited, blondes, male g-spot stimulators, getting ready to teach Year 2, "gok's fashion fix", High street styles, classic style aviators, beach bum styles, contrasting color pairings, Primark, TOPMAN, British boys, "the noble vine", late-night drinks, heart 2 heart chats with roomies at 6 am, Urban Outfitters, cider, the "sex and the city" movie, "zombie strippers", bright colored ties, "twilight" book series, "angel uncovered" by katie price, trash, dirrty behaviors, making out with boys in converted churches, sight-seeing, long-distance phone calls, mobiles, "sidekick", night-buses, queing up, "heaven", roller disco, plentyoffish.com, chatting with old flames from your past who should have stayed in your past but instead end up calling you fucked up and asking you to marry them, un petit pillule et demi, pureness, lynx body wash, ordering things online when you can't find them at your local, the x factor, big brother UK, "friends" reruns on 24/7, dreaming of new tattoos until you can actually afford them, andy warhol originals, seeing live music, dj's, loving your lives, carousels, piers, fake and baking, shopping till you drop, doritos, veganism, bettering yourself and making good decisions, being YOU!

2008-08-17T08:38:00.000-07:00

DEAL-BREAKERS

what are the relationship deal-breakers in your eyes?

imagine the last thing you'd want your boyfriend/girlfriend to tell you...what is it? what does it involve? what would you say? and most importantly, could you get past it?

does there exist certain things/actions/circumstances that are a part of your partner's past that if revealed would cause you to look at them differently, and thusly evaluate how much you want to be with them?

i'm sure everyone can think of something that if heard from your bf/gf's lips would have them running for the hills...but now imagine that you've actually heard it...

now react.

what do you do; do you stick around? do you wait it out? do you try and learn more as to better understand why they did what it is they did? or do you simply turn away and hope that the next one that comes along won't have as much baggage with them?

but what if the next one does? what if the next one's is worse??? or horror of horrors yet, what if you then realize that the one you turned away, meant more to you over-all than their bit of "unfortunate news"???????

they say everyone's threshold of pain is different, but what about our emotional threshold? are some of us better equipped to handle with these "deal-breakers", and if so where do they get their strength???

this one needs time to ponder me thinks...but what if in this case time only shadows the issue even more??? hmmm....

2008-08-12T12:35:00.000-07:00

MIZZ JAMESON

well loads has been happening in the jenna jameson part of the world; let's start with the gorgeous ad you see before you!!!! miss jameson has been involved with peta for quite some time now; she's been quoted as saying it's a cause that's very dear to her heart...and well we all know how down i am with my girl J, and this just solidifies our relationship all the further!!

always an animal lover, in previous peta ad's she's shed her attire in a bid to consumers to purchase "pleather" instead of the ever-animal-cruel "leather".

this time around, she appears naked (and with a killer hair-cut; very much a pornstar take on "the rihanna") alerting us to all be sure to spay/neuter our pets. now this may seem odd to some; what's so wrong with breeding animals??? isn't that like saying to humans "get your tubes tied you dirty whores!"??? but peta brings up a very good point; the more animals go not being spayed or neutered, the more likely they are to go whore around town, get knocked up, and end up having loads of litters that sometimes go uncared for.

now if you're an animal lover; and you freakin' better be, this should hit you close to your heart! i've had both my puppies fixed as soon as i could; not only does it help cut down on the amount of homeless animals roaming the streets, but it also is beneficial to the animal. you'll notice improvements in behaviors as well as the way they act in public!

i also love the cheekiness of the ad; for those of you who can't read between the lines the ad features jenna jameson (aka the Queen of Porn) advertising that sometimes "too much sex, can be a bad thing..." can't you just taste the irony??

and in other jenna news; not that i'm the first to announce it, but my dear JJ is pregnant!!!!!! isn't that exciting???

after suffering miscarriages she's finally preggers with her first child with boyfriend tito ortiz (the UFC dude!) i couldn't be happier for her, she deserves nothing but the best!!!

congrats jenna!!!!!!!!!!

xx

2008-08-06T12:35:00.001-07:00

WHAT I'M LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW

1. Ava Leigh; her cd is not out until September i do believe, but you can find some of her tracks on limewire that have been leaked.

she's fuckin' phenomenal; reggae mixed with pop and a sultry british accent... this blonde beauty lives in Brighton and it shows through her laid-back, hippy/surfer vibe. some note-worthy tracks include "mad about the boy" and "burnin".
2. Lady Gaga; she also is fuckin' phenomenal, yet a tad bit more dancy!! think gwen stefani and madonna's lovechild...complete with sexual experimentation and style of music!!

"just dance" features akon and it's one of summer's best club-bangers!! she's american, blonde (with a fringe), gorgeous, and the "new gay icon" according to yours truly!! other note worthy tracks include "love games", "dirty ice cream", "boys boys boys", and "papparazzi". her cd "the fame" is due out in October.

3. the Ting Ting's; the british pop phenomenon duo is new to the music scene, but with their debut album "we started nothing" they seem like seasoned veterans! a little indy, a little pop-ish, all amazing!!! my favorite track is "shut up and let me go"...and the video is a real trip too!

4. sam sparro; what can i say about the tuxedo-clad babe of "black and gold" video fame. he's openly gay, fantastic, with a retro-new-rave vibe to his music! besides the aforementioned "black and gold", check out "sick" and "cling wrap". not exactly club-bangers, but definitely note-worthy!

5. Natty; this reggae king is new to my ears, but i'm loving what i've heard so far! very mellow reggae, but fantastic!!

check 'em out lovahs, you won't be disappointed!

2008-08-05T13:09:00.001-07:00

WHERE ARE ALL THE LATE 20SOMETHING GUYS????

now this may not make the most sense to my "non-gay/young" fanbase, but check this out: as most of you know i'm quite the fan of plenty of fish (.com) but recently have noticed a certain unfortunate trend happening...

whenever i log on to take a look at what's available, i notice there's a huge divide between the types of guys out there: first of all you have the 18-21 year old's- mostly "newly" out of the closet, new to the "scene", some pill-heads, and very-often-more-often-than-not only into 1-nighters...

now not to categorize them as a formal group or anything, but if i were to lend myself over to the stereotype i might happen to say that these 18-21 year olds (as i was at that age) tend to not know what they want...and if they do know what they want, they don't know how to get it. and if they do know how to get it, usually go about "getting it" all the wrong way. most, and i do mean "most" can be somewhat obsessive, and tend to become easily attached. (k i feel awful to be writing that, cause i was that kind of 18-21 year old...)

so there's one group; the second is the 35-45 year olds...now i don't know too much about that group, since they never seem to message me...or i them...which is odd because i've had a few silver-foxes in my day, and have always found their type (middle-aged, been-around-the-block-know-how-to-use-their-cock, in shape, spry) quite attractive...

my question is this: where are all the in-betweeners??!?!?!?!?!?

like seriously; where are the 24-30 year olds???????

i'll tell you where they are; they've all got boyfriends...

see the 18-21 year olds just haven't found one yet...and the 35-45 year olds are recently divorced/broken-up from their husbands, partners, boyfriends, what-have-you!!!!!!

so what does this mean???? have i missed my chance????? was my long-term relationship out there somewhere and i just let it pass me by???? has mister right come and gone, or even worse-off; have i already had him and let him get-away??!?!?!!?

its infuriating!!!!!!! so this goes out to all the gay 24-30 year olds out there who feel the same way i do...fancy a date?

2008-06-29T06:56:00.000-07:00

1. chez; this little man found moi on good ol' plenty of fish.com...and even though things didn't work out with bachelor #1, i do urge you all to check out that site...good things can come from it, just ask carol!!

anywho, chez is a 20 year old little shit, who swore he was not like others his age..."i'm different..." he cooed as he nuzzled my neck, " i know what i want, and i'm not afraid to go for it"...

le bullshit, i cooed back...and i was right.

no 20 year old knows what they want...let alone have the foggiest clue as to what life is all about. you're just becoming secure with yourself at the age of 20, and there's no way you are mature enough as a gay man to give yourself over to someone else without any hesitation.

a word to the wise people, when a 20 year old from the sticks tells you "you're the one" after only a night and 2 orgasms later (one of which i think he faked), run screaming and save yourself the puzzlement as to why they spurt horseshit from their mouths...

but fuck things sound sexier in a british accent...that you can take my word for

2. the bartender man; this guy was another encounter from p.o.f and would have been a better one if it weren't for the staying up all night (you can just guess) and doing the walk-of-shame home from my all-nighter still wearing last night's outfit (which didn't look as nice at 6 am as it did at 10 pm) and contact lenses.

he was cute, and super sexy, but alas a MANAGER (which i've since sworn off completely this time...really) and once again 21 years old.

well there's not really much to say about this one, since there hasn't been a 2nd encounter due to his impending move back home with his parents...stop snickering...who also live in the sticks...

see bachelor #1 for feelings about boys who live in the sticks.

3. the doctor; this ones one of the boys...sorry, OLD MEN from my past...he was actually my first; yup...we did it in a parking garage outside of a gay bar in halifax...hot, i know...anywho i thought he lived in america now, but after a quick boo at his website (www.drnickevans.com) i found out that he's now a UK resident again...he was born in wales, and has since re-joined the other brits in his homeland!

well, you can only imagine what happened next...

after a few flirtatious texts/calls/emails, we have still yet to meet. and will probably still be waiting. we met in 1999, (which was 9 years ago) and he's now 44 years old...yeah, yeah...he's obviously set in his ways and not too eager to get out of them...what's that about teaching an old dog new tricks??

well that was until he called me last weekend; high off his ass and drunk as a skunk, spouting some sort of amy-winehouse-nonsense about how we should get married, and how in love with me he was, and how much he wants to do *blankety blank blank* to me after all this time...

yada yada yada...well let's just say this dirrty boy discovered his "charlotte-esque" side upon hearing him come on this strong...and i was completely and totally turned off.

a) how can you be this old and still doing drugs????
b) how can you be so resentful after 9 years of the way things ended between us???
c) wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age...k, that's more something i learned rather than a question...but it's still suitable here!

well loves, it's only been a few months...so let's hope the summer continues to sizzle as much as the past while has!!!!!

kisses

2008-06-29T06:38:00.000-07:00

THE MISCELLANEOUS DATING ADVENTURES OF A BUBBLY 20SOMETHING

well recently i have realized just how difficult dating is going to be as i grow older. not that it's going to be any less fun or enjoyable, but that the care-free times of yore are now going to be few and farther between.

i wonder if all singles reach a time in their lives when they start to reevaluate certain relationship decisions they made long ago? I wonder if there's ever a moment of reflection where they wish they had of stuck around with that "certain someone" just a little longer... or maybe they think that things would have been so different if only you had learned to live with "you-know-who's" make-or-break flaw...or maybe it would have been you walking down that aisle instead of your bff if you had of accepted that date with that "what's-his-name" boy who you only had luke-warm feelings for...

this little canadian boy has certainly been around the block a few times...and around, and around, and around, and back again...and i certainly have my share of demons and skeletons in the closet...ones that i've been trying to forget about over the years...but now things are different; now an ocean separates me from my demons, and i find myself in a new land with new ones to be discovered.

does dating ever get easier? will first dates always be like job interviews with cocktails? will i ever be able to see things for how they really are? since i've been in the UK i've decided to cut my losses with the silly-billy's from my past, and look forward instead of behind.

they say things happen when you're not looking for them...but then how do people find eachother on dating websites? isn't that looking???? why are they exceptions to the rule? regardless, i'm going back to being career and "ME" focused...cause children, at the end of the day you're the only one that matters...

remember that

2008-04-15T14:19:00.000-07:00

NEW

well with the blink of an eye, and the crossing of an ocean, life changed all over again...

suddenly i was surrounded by a population who spoke differently than i...suddenly, after 26 years of looking one way before i crossed the street now i had to look the other way...suddenly all the money in my wallet looked unfamiliar...suddenly i had to ask for directions again...suddenly the tv shows all seemed strange and different...suddenly the drivers of cars all sat in the right hand side...suddenly i was starting over...

and as scary as that might seem to those who read this, i welcomed the change with open arms!

suddenly my craving for something new and unfamiliar was satisfied...suddenly my yearning for new faces was met...suddenly my desire for different surroundings felt fulfilled...suddenly my search for something stimulating felt reached...

those who know me know that i don't settle for anything but extremes, its' always been how i built my life...and this move was no exception.

a new smile is upon my face...a new spunk in my step...a new desire to learn everything about my new home buzzes in my brain...

no one's denying it's difficult to leave things behind...but i needed to start making decisions that were best for me...and for that little white and furry fella whose picture you see at the top of this entry...and whose arrival i anticipate like a billion child's anticipation of christmas morning...

next time you're faced with something unknown and unfamiliar...consider the other side...what can you gain from it? how will it fulfill you? will you be a better person because of it?

then jump and go for it!!

Britney Spears - Break The Ice official full length video

2008-03-13T12:35:00.001-07:00

miss spears has decided to go digital for her new single "break the ice". while this is one of my favorite tracks off her "blackout" album...i'm not entirely sure what's happening in this video...hmmm, thoughts? i've heard that she was going for a "toxic" feel to the video...but it's meaning is a little harder to decipher than 'toxic's' message...it may take a few more viewings before i fully comprehend brit-brit's point!

but no one can call her unoriginal!!

2008-03-13T08:12:00.000-07:00

PLEATHER IS THE NEW BLACK...

so my girl jenna is the newest and latest celeb to jump 'board the "Peta train", only this time she's wearing clothes!!!

sorry boys; but miss jenna (who has recently announced at the Adult Film Awards that she is officially retiring from the porn 'biz) is the new face of Peta's "pleather yourself" campaign (take note of the pun on the word "pleather/pleasure...") so i guess some will find it suiting that she's being once again associated with the act of "pleasuring" oneself, seeing as how she's built an entire empire around it!!

"pleather yourself" is a fresh and original take on Peta's anti-fur campaign, advertising "pleather" (aka the once considered outfit material of sluts and skanks alike) as the new alternative to its animal UN-friendly leather counterpart.

i applaud mizz jameson for taking an active role in the fight for animal rights, especially one as unique and so often overlooked as this one; this one being the fight against 'leather'. so many of us purchase leather belts, and shoes without even considering that leather is almost as bad as buying fur...it's just not as 'in your face' as fur is...but it's still something that hopefully (maybe even with the help of Peta's new campaign) will someday soon be abolished.

Peta is offering up "pleather" as one of the many alternatives to leather goods; i don't think they expect any of us to throw away whatever leather they have hanging in their closets, especially since this little vegetarian can't afford to go out and purchase a whole new wardrobe's worth of black dress shoes and belts!!

but one thing is for sure; you can bet that i'm going to start searching far and wide for more animal friendly "pleather" alternatives...even ones that aren't for the bedroom...

rowwwwrrrr!!

2008-02-24T13:35:00.000-08:00

RANDOM THOUGHTS FROM A BORDER-LINE ADHD PERSONALITY...

a. sooo the oscars are on tonight, and despite almost being cancelled due to the catastrophic writers strike that had impeded hollywood-land and all it's happenings, the show will go on!!

little lesbian ellen page, who just happens to be a hali-grown native, is up for best actress for her role as a pregnant teen-ster in the fabulously lovable comedy "Juno"...i and the rest of nova scotia are crossing our fingers for you mizz page; clean the floor with those pretentious hollywood bitches!!!

b. saw a fantastic (and free) concert last night; Canadian rockers/blue grass/crooners/country stars "blue rodeo" graced the stage of the metro center last night in halifax: and fuckin' rocked the shit outta the place, might i add! those guys may be pusing 60 but they still know how to put on a bitchin' show! it was the second time i saw them live in my dear ol' city of origin, and like the first time you have sex, were even better the second time around!!

the fabulous and lovely miss laura had been given tickets that her aunt had won over the radio, and decided to invite lil' ol' me along for the ride! something about a free concert, that makes it so much more enjoyable; maybe it's the lack of "pressure to have a good time" when you didn't pay anything to walk through the doors? hmmm...

c. my lover, and future roommate miss carolyn power leaves for the UK tomorrow...and i'm a little upset that i'm (myself and jet, that is) aren't leaving at the same time; for those of you who aren't aware, carol (as i sometimes call her) and i met in the far, faraway land of Fort Kent while studying to become teachers. we fell in love, slept together a few times, and have remained very close friends! (well, it went something like that...) and we are now moving to jolly ol' England together for work and other sorts of debauchery!

as much as i'd love to leave now instead of waiting another month, i know that it's much more feasible for me to be waiting; more time to work and thus save money to move with, and i'll be separated for less time from my dear jet...(who'll be joining me in the UK a few more months!)

d. why is it that when on the bus in halifax (aka the peasant wagon) we willingly give up our seats for fat people...excuse me, "overweight" people???? by allotting them special treatment (such as giving them our seats on the bus) aren't we encouraging them to continue to overeat??? we're basically reassuring them; go ahead and have that double extra carcus burger...don't worry, you may get fat, but at least you'll be treated better and pitied as a reward for your shitty eating habits... the only people who should have seats given up for them are those with small children, and those who suffer from a physical disability...not heffers who can't stop themselves from shoving junk down their throats!

e. i'm so compltely into amy winehouse's music these days, it's crazy!!!! at first i thought she was just kinda scary...but then i gave her music a chance and let me tell you; WOW!! she's fuckin' phenomenal!!!! i urge you all to seek out her music and obsess away!

there's nobody out there in the music industry today who has is doing what she's doing; she truly is a breath of fresh air...a somewhat 'troubled' breath, but a breath nonetheless! she's kinda "big band-ish", with a soulful and loungy feel to her voice...her '60's beehive hairdo is a throwback to the days of yore, that her voice complements perfectly.

favorites of mine include "valerie" featuring mark ronson, "back to black", and "love is a losing game".

xoxo

2008-02-21T05:58:00.000-08:00

LOOKING AROUND...

as i sit here, a mere month (give or take) away from my date of departure, there's a lot going through my mind...how will i live without my jet for 4 months, how will i adjust to a foreign land, will i make friends, will i find a hot brit to call my own (snicker, snicker)...

then my mind wonders to larger, more pressing issues; will they like me, will i fit in, will i be able to live comfortably, will i love my schools, will i get hopelessly lost on the underground and have to call carolyn to come pick me up??!?! haha! k, the last one isn't totally a justifiably-worry!!

moving from the place that you've called "home" for oh so long is never going to be easy...there will always be feelings of melancholy, and a desire for the familiar...picking up and moving somewhere different is bound to be scary...but odly i'm not feeling plagued by these feelings of fear and uncertainty...i'm fuckin' stoked!!

the good thing is that i'm not going at it alone...plus i've done it before! and if i can do it, and 'do' the only other gay guy in a small town in northern maine...then i can do ANYTHING!!

as i look around the little town that has housed me and my lil' family for so many years, i'm suddenly struck with the oh so many things i'll miss about this silly little town; i'll miss the late night walks i've had in clayton park through it's winding and undiscovered pathways, i'll miss the summer's spent walking along halifax's boardwalk, i'll miss my hang-over days spent at the pool with my big shades covering up my dark circles, i'll miss being able to skinny-dip in said pool...after dark, of course...i'll miss our little day trips to the beach, pooches in tow!! i'll miss halifax's assortment of drinking establishments, i'll miss spring garden rd and it's many shops and beautiful people, and most of all i'll miss my friends...

but one thing is for certain, that as much as i'm giving up by leaving halifax again, i'm also gaining a whole lot more this time around...i'm not going to shittsville USA, i'm going to the most exciting city in the freakin' world!!!!

take that fort kent, maine!!

2008-02-13T05:31:00.000-08:00

WINTER VOYEURISM

so big brother started again last night, and i'm more addicted ALREADY than ever!!!

i decided to include a pic of the two gay 'eye candy' boys who are part of this season, for all your viewing pleasures!!

the idea behind this season is that all players took a 'love quiz' before the show started, and are paired in the house with their potential "soulmate"; they'll be sleeping in the same bed as their soulmate, competing with them, voting with them, and even be up for eviction with them!!!! can you say, trouuuuuble!!!!!

it's certainly a new spin on an old idea and it's gonna get juicy!!!! included amongst the contestants are the two fabulous gay men (who i'm totally hot for), a recently broken-up couple, a real-life couple (who are pretending to not even know eachother), a cougar, a paparrazzo, a bikini barista, and many more!!!

it should certainly be a good season, stay tuned!!!

2008-02-12T10:02:00.000-08:00

BE KIND...

so today in the lunch room somebody "confronted" me on my specific values by which i live my life, specifically on my eating habit values; basically i was put-down and almost ridiculed for choosing not to eat meat. even more reduntant was the fact that "she" basically told me that i was going to be shit out of luck when it came to finding appropriate "vegetarian fare" when i moved to the UK, and that i would have to rely on 'care packages' delivered from canada for survival...

well to quote my future people, that's a pile of bollocks!!!

you know what, i'm pretty fuckin' tired of people practically making fun of me for choosing a 'animal-loving' way of living, that not to mention is also for health reasons. now don't get me wrong, i have no problem answering questions from meat-eaters who approach the issue with the inevitable "omg, you're a vegetarian...like what do you eat??? how do you survive??" since they're bound to come up. but why would someone go out of their way to basically put my lifestyle decision down and make it seem inferior to their own...it's fuckin' retarded people, so mind your own business!!

not once have i ever made fun of people for eating carcus in front of me, and not once would i preach about the dangers/polluting factors involved with eating meat, to someone who didn't ponder it to me...i have no problem defending my position on the issue and i certainly don't mind educating those who are eager to understand why i'm a vegetarian (i think it's mean, unnecessary and unhealthy...to name a few...)

i do not wish to instill my values and beliefs upon others who aren't interesting in learning what i have to tell them...i believe that choosing a vegetarian lifestyle is something that you have to do for yourself...so on that note don't harp on me or throw meat-eating defences down my throat...cause i don't fuckin' buy it...

why would someone even say something so detrimental to me?? i'm sorry, but you don't live in england, nor have you ever even been there...how do you pretend to know what they may or may not have in their grocery stores/markets??? how do you know that they don't have the widest assortment of veggie food available in all of europe??? in fact, a little fyi for you; maybe you weren't aware of the fact that the UK founded the worlds first "vegan organization" giving support and spreading knowledge as to the benefits of choosing such a lifestyle...so don't tell me that i won't find the necessary nourishment i need there, cause they fuckin' founded it!!!!!!

2008-02-08T19:27:00.001-08:00

DIRTY PRETTY THINGS

i love this photo of the world's naughtiest threesome, out on the town, dressed to the nine's...and totally fucked up!!!

for those of you at a loss for words as to when and where this little "strategically-planned-photo-op" took place; this was just around the time that britney's (continual) downfall was starting to snowball at drastic speeds! it was just around the time that she ended her "temporary insanity" induced marriage to k-what's his fuck, and was rejoining the club-crowd and making up for lost time...

i guess from this perspective, we have no one to blame but dear sweet innocent paris, right?? there's a battle you're sure to lose!!

everytime i look at this pic taken of the 3 troublemakers in the car together, i can't help but wonder; how fucked up were they????? haha!! seriously though, can you imagine being a fly on the wall in that car?? or better yet, can you picture being an invite to the fuckin' party???

nicole richie gave readers a front-row seat in the retellings of her troubled, drug-fueled past in her tell-all book "the truth about diamonds", but i have always wondered if there was more to the story...

i guess being as huge a media-whore as i am, i can't help but want to know the WHOLE story...right down to every snort...

well one thing's for sure, these girls sure know how to party, and certainly have the hook-ups to make it happen!! i wonder what a night on the town with them might have actually been like??

probably best left a mystery though, eh?

2008-02-06T18:31:00.000-08:00

PHEROMONES IN HAIR GEL???

did you know that "got2b" hair products have just come out with a product that is apparently infused with pheromones???

if you're anything like me, you may need a basic refreshment as to what a "pheromone" actually is before this conversation can continue: a pheromone is a chemical that is naturally produced by our bodies that causes a physiological reaction to occur in other people.

studies have shown that we as human beings at our most primal and natural states are simply animals reacting to each other's scents...these scents namely referred to as "pheromones".

my ponderance upon reading this ad was how exactly does a company "infuse" pheromones into a hair gel?? and if such a feat was to be accomplished, what kind of "reaction" or "stimulation" to our senses will this product infer?

the ad shows a very GQ lookinkg man obviously using the company's said product, surrounded by a mass of gorgeous looking ladies...hence invoking the idea that wearing this product will enhance your sexual prowess to the opposite sex...or in my case the same sex...*wink, wink*

well if you ask me, note: i'm an eternal optimist, this product is either the most genius creation of man up to date...or simply a pile of hooey...

therefore to solve this debate, i urge you all to go out and purchase "got2b's pheromone infused hair gel" and report directly back to me with your results...

discuss.

2008-01-26T19:02:00.000-08:00

I WANT YOU ALL OVER ME...

soooo, totally random but i think someone should tell miss spears that it's dangerous to drive at night with sunglasses on...now don't get me wrong, i enjoy wearing my sunglasses well beyond sun-down, but i mean come on?!?!!? i know you have cameras in your face like 24/7, and the flashbulbs must give you migraines...but there's really no need to be wearing shades after dark when you're behind the wheel...and believe me when i say that we've all had enough of your fake gucci's...you're britney spears for fuck sakes, can't you at least afford a hot pair of chanel's?????

soooo perez hilton always has these "not so blind items" posted on his site where he blogs about certain secret celebs, giving us hints as to their identities, all the while painting certain incriminating portraits of them...and the last one i read was about a certian "recently rehabbed" male celeb who was caught snorting lines in the back of his limo at the sundance film fest recently...and i'm going to start my own type of guessing game...and peg colin farrell as the mystery celeb of the day...i just saw in "OK " magazine that he was photographed on numerous occasions drinking bottles of "water"...and we all know water cures dry mouth due to somethin' somethin'...so that's my prediction of the week!!

stay tuned for more details and predictions of next week's mystery badness!!

so i've recently begun tanning...something i swore i'd never do, seeing as how there's skin cancer in my family and i have numerous tattoos that i never want to fade...(but don't worry, i've been protecting my ink!!) anyways, today was my third session, and suddenly when the bed turned on i looked up and had an odd realization; this is weird!!!!!

when did it become considered beautiful to cook in a tanning bed for days at a time??? it's kind of funny when you think of it; we rotisserie ourselves (in a matter of speaking) in effort to make ourselves more attractive...does that sound weird to anyone else??? can you imagine if it all of a sudden became attractive to look hideously and ghostly pale???? all the tanning salons would all of a sudden go out of business and everyone would be walking around carrying umbrellas on sunny days to shield themselves from the sun...

hopefully that will never happen...cause i think i'm officially on my way to tanorexia!!!

wish me luck!!

xoxo

2008-01-23T09:58:00.000-08:00

SERIOUSLY THOUGH...

it's no secret that young hollywood is, has been, and will always be plagued by certain inevitable bouts and run-ins with illicit drugs and other illegal substances...but is it just me or is it starting to turn DEADLY???

it seems like every time you turn around one such celeb is on their way to the ever-trendy stint in rehab (a la lindsay lohan), or caught smoking crack on film (hello amy winehouse), or caught dead in your bed surrounded by bottles of sleeping pills and residue of powdery substances on 20 dollar bills (r.i.p heath ledger). this type of behavior is becoming an epidemic in hollywood, and one that is certainly not to be taken lightly...

kids today all over the world are starting to dabble in the "club" lifestyle (which is generally how it starts), and then before you know it their extra-curricular "weekend activities" are starting to take over their lives (which have begun to down-spiral out of control!)

it's nothing short of a complete tragedy if you ask me; these young actors and musicians have everything they've ever wanted being handed to them on a gold splattered platter...and they're wasting all their well deserved attention being stalked by tmz.com trying to catch them in the midst of one of their drug-fueled binges...

since when did rehab become the new 'black'???? honestly people, if you're going to go crazy and party your lives away, i have some words of advice: everything in moderation, hire a fucking driver, becareful of who your 'friends' are, beware of camera phones when you're snorting lines in the bathroom stall with your "comrades", be nice to people so as to not piss them off, and for jesus sakes stay away from paris hilton...she seems to be the one to stir the "trouble pot" every now and then for previously-innocent baby-celebs!!

2008-01-22T18:12:00.000-08:00

LOOK FOR THE ______, AND YOU'LL FIND ME:

the inevitable coffee rings i leave all over the tables where i'm sitting in the a.m. hours, the trail of gossip magazines i leave behind after i finish eating, the unpoped popcorn kernels that fall out of the popcorn maker after i make my "fix" for the night, my collection of empty red bull cans that i can never seem to deposit in recycling bins, my collection of stolen pens that i take without even knowing it, the perezhilton.com site address that you'll find on the history of every computer that i sit down in front of, the trail of receipts that i always keep from bought items ranging from gum to electronic devices, the dirty foot prints that i leave all over the house in the winter time, the keys that i leave in the door far more often than not, my collection of "the coast" issues that i keep in every room of my house, my day-planner that is never far from my side, my ever-beeping cell phone that is constantly at my side, my gwen stefani harajuku lovers man-bag that i don't go anywhere without, my little barking pooch whom i'd take everywhere with me if i could, the sound of "dentyne ice" being chomped down upon that i chew constantly, the sound of humming coming from somewhere almost unmistakable...

teehee

2008-01-18T17:28:00.000-08:00

DREAM A LITTLE DREAM...

i have never been able to remember my dreams...no matter how i tried, or how many "dream recognition" exercises i practiced before i fell asleep, when i woke, never fail, my dreams were forgotten...

i even sometimes think that i simply DON'T dream...like i'm missing that part of the brain that allows people to escape their daily issues and fantasize about the untouchable...

now while i'm aware that it's physically and neurologically impossible to NOT dream; everyone who enters into REM sleep, dreams...and most are completely and totally able to remember at least some part or image from the dreams they drempt...and then another select few of us are completely and totally UNABLE to remember them...and yet still are forced to regale in the retellings of our friends past dreamscapes and nightmares...

well from the mouth of someone who CANNOT remember their dreams; let me tell you that we don't wanna hear about it bitches!!!?!? and we feel you're bragging that you can revel in the afterthoughts of your amazing and bewildering dreams all freakin day long...so cut it out!!!

now don't get me wrong, everynow and then i'll wake up with a certain image still burning in my short-term memory...but most of the time the images aren't pleasant ones, and are usually leftovers from nightmares (yes, i too get those sometimes...and unfortunately those types tend to be the ones that stick around!) or else the rest of the time the images won't make sense, and when i try to put them into words i'm at a loss...and i end up forgetting anyways...left only with the feeling they gave me...

and yet sometimes still i'll wake up to find out that my little friend has been enjoying some pleasant images from within my twisted mind, and will be standing at full attention...and who am i to deny him his satisfaction?? at least part of me is benefiting from my dreams!!

but in the end, when i really consider my situation, i come to the realization that things could be a lot worse! i could be one of those people who have the utmost trouble falling asleep in the first place...or i could be plagued by incessant fits of tossing and turning/waking up in the middle of the night unable to fall back asleep...man, that would be shitty...

so i am at least proud to say (knock on wood) that i am able to fall asleep very blissfully, and at a whim...whether completely exhausted or just slightly in need of a snooze!! so there!!

besides, why waste time dreaming when the real world is so much more exciting?

*wink, wink*

xoxo

2008-01-16T14:37:00.000-08:00

WHAT I CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF NOW:

perezhilton.com (i'm horribly addicted, like seriously i check him 50 times a day...i want to marry him), jet (that goes without saying), the UK (my future home), "dragonette" (download away bitches, she's amazing...totally rockin' scenester pop; aka sexalicious), posh and becks (the new 'brangelina' that is here to stay...beyond sexy and forever beautiful trendsetters of the globe...simply a-mazing), putting garlic on my popcorn (melt some in with your butter if you're using a hot-air popper), the new fluroescent colored boxer-briefs from american eagle (too cute), ginch gonch briefs for men, the magazine "strut" (for both men and women; a little bit gay and all-over fantastic), the new "sex and the city" movie coming out in may, youporn.com (you'll never pay for porn again), marilyn monroe (vintage photos, her music from her movies, and the bio "goddess; the secret lives of marilyn monroe"), andy warhol prints (simply long-lasting works of pure genius), britney (sad, i know...i just feel absolutely 100% horrible about her situation...the world won't be satisfied until her predicament ends in pure tragedy), goveg.com (amazing recipes for the vegetarian on the run), tanning (i know, i know...but glowing skin sure is one way to beat the winter blues), facebook (just when i thought the excitement was winding down, they go and re-vamp it and make it all the more fantastic!!), the name "harlow" for girls, the apple iphone (hoping to buy one in the UK!!)

...and much much more!!

2008-01-13T14:07:00.000-08:00

LONG LIVE THE QUEEN

well the adult film industry (and myself) have suffered a great loss last night...during the AVN adult expo awards saturday, the self-proclaimed 'queen of porn' herself announced her retirement from the business... :(

she was quoted as saying: "Honesty is key," she said. "I will never ever ever spread my legs again in this industry. Ever!"

she was greeted with overwhelming boooo's from the audience as her long-time supporters expressed their sadness that she was leaving.

for those of you who are new to this blog...and to me...i have had a long-time obsession with ms. jameson that has continued to grow over the years. she's absolutely fantastic and this little gay boy has had a deep routed fascination with her for some time now! and i think i speak for many thousands of people out there when i say that she will surely be missed!

ain't nobody that can suck a cock like jenna!!

for those of you who are unfamiliar with jenna's work, visit www.clubjenna.com to get a taste of our girl. she truly is the founding mother of all things pornographic; having sat at the helm of her production company for years, she has helped discover many new 'fresh' talent to someday take her place as the reigning queen...and it looks like that day is upon us.

check out her bio (and my personal favorite book ever read) "how to make love like a porn star"; i guarantee it will change your life!

she's certainly been through some shit in her time, but i dare say that i doubt we've seen the last of jenna...her memory (and her implants) will certainly survive the test of time!!

the gays love you miss jameson, and we hope to see your fantastic shining face and boobs around for years to come!!

love always,
xoxo

2008-01-10T17:54:00.000-08:00

CONFESSIONS OF 2007

i fell in love when i shouldn't have let myself, i fell out of love just as fast and dealt with it badly, i was a terrible friend on more than one occasion, i screened my calls far too often, i sounded interested in people's situations when i really really wasn't, i talked behind too many people's backs, i carried coke in my pocket across the border, i smuggled booze across the border, i hung out with people because i thought it would make me seem more important, i allowed myself to be guilted into sex, i put far too much shit up my nose, i spent money unwisely, i gossiped about those i loved, i had a hate-on for weddings/relationships/engagements, i ate pills and mixed them with booze, i prank-texted exes, i used people for what they could give me, i bought many new sex toys, i cried heavily over my proplems, i developed a fear for living on my own (which i then conquered), i fought and had mean thoughts about loved ones, i acted fake to many a people, i watched a helluva lot of porn, i was compeltely and utterly two-faced, i skinny-dipped in my pool, i had a summer-bout with solo-exhibitionism, i renewed a love for weed, i had panic attacks, i got scared of being hurt again in a relationship, i lied my ass off to get out of a bind, i borrowed money from people with no intention of ever giving it back, i spent a lot of time on "dating websites", i got new tattoos with money i should have been doing other things with, i sweated a lot of small stuff, i totally stiffed a cab driver on the fee...

and i learned my lessons...and am a better person for it.

2008-01-08T11:11:00.000-08:00

just a little something i found online that i thought was genius and had to share with all of you.

it's basically britney invisioned as the mother mary...or something like that. she's surrounded by all the things that complete her and make her holy; starbucks, the hollywood sign, candy, her children.

it's really quite the vision since we as a society have allowed her to rise to such an immortal status. we have given her the power to rule over her land of minions by obsessing over her every move. and for those who haven't been obsessing over her every move you have at the very least partaken in many a water cooler chats over the dear pop princess, i'm sure...

i have chosen not to comment too much on her (somewhat inevitable) downfall that has surfaced in the news as of late...simply because i'm sure if you're anything like my mother you're on official britney overload...but what can we say, we're a sucker for a billionaire's pending breakdown!! try as we will, britney continues to reign even when she's scraping rock bottom...and who does she have to thank for her new-found and continuous attention??

US!!

if you ask me, i betcha her cd sales are soaring now thanks to her latest tantrum...i think she should release a new video...i bet it would kill

2008-01-01T16:03:00.000-08:00

LADIES AND GAY BOYS

may i introduce to you Chris Evans. some of you may recognize him from such flicks as "Fantastic Four", "Not another teen movie", "Cellular", and the most recently romantic comedy/cuming-of-age movie "the nanny diaries"...also known as the "movie i just finished watching".

ahem

i have been mildly obsessed with chris evans and his apparent HOTNESS since i first laid gay eyes on him when he spoofed freddie prinze jr in "not another teen movie", he had black hair and played the highschool popular jock character...and i know you can't forget about his "whipped cream banana split" scene from that movie where he appears naked with only whipped cream covering up his naughty parts...oh, and he had a banana stuck up his ass...how could i forget about that part!!!!

well i really must admit that there's a certain something about this fella that has always gotten my kahonas to rise...and he doesn't show signs of stopping anytime soon!! especially by the looks of this photo you see on my right!!!

he is dreamy sex-bomb cute, and i just figured you might all want a little dose of sexuality on this otherwise lazy new year's day!!

happy new year, by the way!!

2007-12-30T12:04:00.000-08:00

NYE

well this year especially, there's been some controversy surrounding new year's and the 'going-on's'...mostly because once again people can't seem to decide what they want to do. either that or they're waiting for their friends to make up their minds, or maybe it's because they're magically waiting for something to spontaneously spring-up that might end up being better then what they currently have planned...

who knows??!! but for whatever reason, new year's has begun to gather some 'indecisive stigma' around it...maybe it's our age?? maybe we've reached that age when what would have before been an inviting and exciting thing to do, now seems a tad bit blase and unstimulating!

have we become so jaded about new year's that no matter what we do, or what parties we attend, or even how much we drink/drug nothing seems to meet our expectations??

there certainly is a certain amount of pressure that surrounds december 31st every year; we always get dressed up, drink tonnes, go to like 6 different parties, try and see EVERYONE at once, and all we end up doing is fighting or arguing with our friends over where to go next, or who to see, or how long to stay, or what to do afterwards!! in the end everyone ends up splitting up and doing their own things anyway...some come home pissed off, some end up throwing up, and some even end up taking someone home in a last minute fit of desperation in hopes of not waking up alone on new year's day!!

so this year i've decided to do something a bit different; i took matters into my own hands and decided to suggest a night out; dinner party, followed by dancing in a swanky downtown club! i even offered to buy the tickets for people as long as they emailed me the money on time! ok, yes i took some of my teaching initiative and set deadlines for people to follow, which certainly set a fire under some people's asses and got them in gear!! and it worked!!

now we all get to sit back, lift a glass, dance our asses off, and enjoy the evening!!

so to all of you who still remain undecided towards what they want to do tomorrow, i give this advice; close your eyes, take a breath, and go with your first instinct! lol!

but honestly as long as you're with the people you love on new year's, how could you have a bad time??!?! chances are your mind's already made up anyway!!

happy new year's my lovelies, 2007 certainly kicked my ass once or twice as i'm sure it did yours...but all in all, it wasn't half bad! there's a lot of things i learned, a lot of things i will never do again, and a lot of things i can't wait to try for the second time!!

but for details on those, you'll have to stay tuned for my confessions of 2007 entry...it's sure to be a juicy one!!

xoxo

2007-12-29T15:56:00.000-08:00

MR. PERFECT

Hi Joey, my name's Mr. Perfect. I'm 5'10", 175 lbs, long scruffy/trendy dark brown hair, sky-blue transcendent eyes, full even lips, and a piercing gaze. I can attribute my "abercrombie & fitch model's" body, to my weekend job as a surf instructor in Malibu; Surfing is truly my passion, and it's allowed me to achieve the statuesque frame you see before you. I don't even work out besides swimming, (unless you count the cardio i get from shopping) so the rest is due to pure good genes!

My real job is I'm a Veterinarian at the local animal shelter; I've always been the biggest animal lover, and now I get to surround myself with them all day long! My wish is to one day open my very own vet clinic that functions part-time as a shelter for lost/abused/neglected animals.

During my down time you can usually find me at home playing in the yard with my 2 chihuahua's, 1 doperman pincher, and 3 border collies at my beachside bungalow, or playing guitar and learning all the "no doubt" tracks by heart...acoustic versions of course...even though i'm no stranger to a good "rock-out" jam to some "Stones" or some "Bob Marley". I always said that if I could meet one band, it would be "No Doubt", "Elvis", or "Bob Marley"...just something about reggae that reminds me of my childhood!

I guess you could say I'm looking for a hyper guy who could put up with my sometimes-ADHD-behaviours, my "bleeding-heart-animal-freakness", someone with exaggerated features, who can't help but appreciate the little things in life, loves to be cuddled and will let me hold him in my arms and take-in the smell of his skin...I've always been a sucker for a guy who's a little bit smaller than me, in good shape, who has a kickin' personality, loves kids, who will laugh at my silly jokes, eat popcorn during scary movies, let me hold his hand when he's sad, skinny-dip in the ocean with me at night, and who let's me be who i am...

I love to eat, read trashy magazines, laugh at myself, chill and be lazy, listen to music morning noon and night, sleep-in on weekends, swim more than walk, listen to sappy tunes on the radio, dress-up and be dumb, get tattoos, go for martinis or a good bottle of wine, stay up late talking, make-out for hours, be on top, watch interior-design shows, and go out dancing!

A gift from "le chateau" would get you points, pay attention to the details, don't play games, look me in the eye and be honest, value your friendships, want to get to know me, love my animals, don't be afraid to get close, tell me you love me, flatter me with your honesty, show me that you care, think about me when i'm gone, be yourself...

care for a date?

2007-12-26T15:21:00.000-08:00

WINTER OF...

having wine come out of your ears, drinking waaaay too much, family get-togethers, finishing up placements, GRADUATION!!!!, the United Kingdom, moving to a land far far away, british boys, not needing your gaul blatter, even more tattoos, going without for a year, no more powederous substances, wet dreams, hooking up with old flames who should have been left in the past cause of their tremendously assholish behaviors, trying to be happy for people even though it obviously shows that you aren't, not hiding your feelings anymore no matter how hurtful they may seem/be, bribing veterinarians, moving on, OFFICIALLY BEING A TEACHER, officially becoming a GOOD teacher, loving what you do, standing up for yourself, platinum blondes, harajuku lovers accessories, going and staying "green", conserving energy, sweet sweet vegetarianism, almost becoming a vegan, suspenders, vests, black ties, preppy looks, style, trends, catwalk shows, missing my chihuahua, accepting and acting more your age, trying not to date anymore 20 year olds, thinking you have ADHD, starbucks coffee, finding yourself tanning in tanning beds even though you always swore you would never, perezhilton.com, not smoking for a year, friends buying property and getting married and having way too much money to buy expensive brand new cars and other things i can' t afford right now that's making me somewhat resentful, having a "tween" crush on zac efron, not remembering your dreams...except for the dirrty ones, still being obsessed with facebook, short hair cuts, wearing UGGS but not buying any more pairs cause they're kind of bad, not feeling bad about not sending out christmas cards or keeping in touch with people who you have grown apart from, britney britney and more britney, "blackout", colette's "push" album, being gay and fantastic, celebrity gossip up the ass, finding new addictions, new large purple toys, being able to take them, hooray for no drama, living out loud, having your eyes wide open, not sweating the small stuff, having a crush on certain tv meteorologists, knowing what's good for you and going for it, being happy!!

2007-12-24T04:58:00.000-08:00

READY TO DRINK AWAY MY CHRISTMAS

is it sad that i'm just looking forward to this christmas thing being over with for the year?? i know, i know i should probably have more of a christmas spirit...but honestly with no money to purchase gifts with, and rain instead of snow, i don't believe there is a cure for my 'christmas blues' this year...

and it's funny, cause just when i think i may have found some christmas spirit from deep down within my belly, something else changes my mood and i'm back to being a "bah humbub"-scrooge type kinda guy!!

and do you wanna hear the worst part??? i'm annoyed by all those 'holly-jolly'-types, who are constantly humming christmas carols under their breath, and walking with a seasonal-spring in their step, and sending out revolting xmas cards filled with tidings of great joy...blah, blah, blah...wake me when it's over!

maybe if i had been more able to experience the hustle/bustle of the season would i be more apt to celebrate the festivities...or maybe if i had been able to put together a "wishlist" might i have been more excited to wake up and seen what silly things might be laying under our tree tomorrow morning...or maybe if we had an actual tree in our living room to decorate, instead of our more environmentally-conscious-greenhouse-gas-less little tree...(don't get me wrong though, i'm all about our little tree, it's just that it doesn't feel too christmassy in our house having not been able to decorate a larger one...and last but not least, i think another reason why i'm not Mr. Christmas this year, is because this if the first year that my Harley won't be a part of it...i miss that little guy more than words can say, and anyone out there who's celebrating this year minus one loved one knows how i feel...i miss you my darling...MUAH!

so on that note, i will however still bid ya'll a merry one...but wake me up on new year's...

(ps; the pic is of a britney of yore on last new year's eve...a time when she was still blonde, happy, and fucked up...le sigh...live it up brit'ster!!)

2007-12-20T14:48:00.000-08:00

ho ho

hey kiddies,what's shakin??

well since you all know i'm not one for sending out cards (of anysort; they're bad for the environment and make me feel silly!!) i thought i would send everyone their holiday greetings through my fav' way to communicate with everyone...

sooooo, it's a silly ol' time of year, full of plenty of good eats, drinks, and festive parties!! most of us are broke ass po, but the select few have cash to burn...and to them i say "bah humbug!!" but all christmas cheer is not lost with this little twink; i even caught myself singing along to "i saw mommy kissing santa claus..." the other day at school...it was then that i realized that all hope was lost...consider myself bitten by the ghost of christmas future!!!

so to all my fort kent-ers, i wish ya'll a happy end of placements, and good luck in your future teaching experiences! to my other children, i wish you nothing but good luck and prosperity in the future year that lies ahead! 2007 was a tough year, a sad year, a happy year, a long year, a complicated year, a sexxy year, and a year jam-packed with as much britney as you can stuff into a dirrty sock...and thank god for that!! thoughts are uplifting for 2008, and i hope it finds all my little chillies with nothing but good cheer and mucho mucho amour!!

peace, and love bitches,

xoxo

2007-12-07T14:28:00.000-08:00

FLICK

from the small HBO screen on which we all fell in love, to the big silver screen itself...our sexy ladies are on their way. while the info that there was a "sex and the city" movie in production is not news, the official teaser trailer was released today and, well, i got a little excited!!! haha!!

i tried to post it to my blog but it was "unpostable"...so you'll have to go search for it yourself!! haha!

i was a little unsure about how i felt about my favorite tv show making the leap to "flick" status...but all in all, i have high hopes. you never know what to expect when a tv show is made into a movie, but when you're as good as "sex..." is i know they wouldn't let us die-hard's hopes down!! at least i hope not.

i've been very careful to avoid any and all leaks that have made their way onto the internet, and you can bet your bottom dollar i intend to remain that way! we're not having a repeat perfomance of what happened with the finale...fuckin' eh...

haha

2007-11-25T13:49:00.000-08:00

AWAY AGAIN

dear lovers,

i know it's been a little while since you've heard my sweet voice (lol) but i'm here in an officialy capacity to tell you all now that i will be keeping up with my posts from this moment on. I'm not going to sit here and make excuses for not blogging; you can all imagine what they may be (busy, no time, half-crazy...etc, etc)

so i've been living back in halifax for almost 6 months now...and it's been a little rough; mainly due to the fact that i have no guaranteed income, and the fact that my little jet and i have been living in my parents basement, which is quickly starting to resemble the inside of a freezer...

but alas i have come this far, i know we can make it another month...

which is why i'm mainly writing tonight...i wanted to shed some light on what i've been thinking of doing after i (officially) graduate. i know i've spoken to most of you about moving away to teach somewhere else once my practicum was over. and well, i've finally made up my mind as to what i'm going to do, and more specifically where i'm going to go...

my dear friend (and fellow teacher) carolyn and i have been slowly working our way through the checklist of necessary things to accomplish before we pick up and move to the U.K.

yes, you read correctly...this little canadian twink will soon be partyin' with the brits!!!

the school system in the United Kingdom works much differently than it does in canada...basically you don't get hired by the school board in england, but by recruitment agency's. the schools hire these agency's to find them teachers, and it's the agency's job to basically find people like me work! i've recently signed up with one by the name of Timeplan, who operate mainly around the London area, and have been in constant contact with their canadian rep to make sure i'm dotting all my I's and crossing my T's. It's a slow process, but as soon as i get my working visa...it's carved in stone!

i at first had my eye on new zealand, and while i haven't given up on the kiwi's, the UK is more of a feasible option right now. mainly because it's easier for beginner teachers to find employment over there than in new zealand.

i've come to the conclusion that there is officially nothing left for me in halifax...and that i've done /dated/worked/lived/enjoyed/cried/studied/met/fucked/drank (etc) my way from one side of it to the other...and it's time to continue moving forward.

one of the reasons i decided that this career was for me, was the option it permitted to travel...and its my turn to get out...

i don't have the ties that my other loved ones have...besides my jet, who is obviously coming with me...(i've promised him a little british brother, so that's what he's gonna get!! ) so now's the time to take that leap! i've been pushing things away for the past few months, so that i wouldn't get attached to anything in halifax...and it's somewhat the reason why i haven't been in touch with some of you for the last little while...i guess i just assumed it would be easier this way.

so i'm getting a little nervous, but all in all i've never been more excited and ready for anything in my whole life...i'm sure when some of you read this you'll be a little shocked, since i haven't had the option to tell you what i've been thinking yet...but realize that i don't have my plane ticket in my hand yet or anything...but it's what i've decided to do...all that's left is lose ends...

THE ORIGINAL Scary 'Mary Poppins' Recut Trailer

2007-10-31T14:31:00.001-07:00

happy halloween boyles and ghouls...just a little something for this spooktacular evening...i hope you all have a terrifyingly good halloween...

sleep tight my precious'...

2007-10-08T15:09:00.000-07:00

DEATH OF REFLECTIONS

a wise one once said, that if a difference is to be made, something has to change. as to what in particular he was referring, i'm not entirely sure...but what i do know, is that this is and HAS TO BE my new motto. i've been wallowing a lot lately in a certain kind of disappointment that only i have the keys to undoing...the answer is completely and utterly obvious, and just as attainable. but for some reason, as hard as i try, and as often as i say i won't, i keep falling...

someone with half a brain will say that that's how they designed it to be, and that that's exactly how it's sepposed to make you feel. but that's not good enough of a reason for me.

i've always prided myself on not repeating mistakes...making new ones, however, is somewhat expected for someone my age, and for people of all ages for that matter! but there is one mistake in my life that i continuously repeat, that has to stop for good...and i think i'm beginning to realize just what needs to be done to solve this seemingly plaguing problem; REMOVE THE TEMPTATIONS!!

i've realized that this was the problem and the solution for some time now...although i hadn't wanted to admit it to myself. i've had a long-lasting love affair with the area contained within those four walls, and a lot of good times have been had therein. a lot of money has been spent, a lot of drugs have been done, and a lot of kisses have been stolen...along with my long-ago lost innocence that was given up in the since knocked-down parking garage outside it's very doors. it's going to be hard to cut my ties with a place that i have begun to hate to love... and i'm sure many evenings will be spent longing for "the good old days" of yore...

but all in all, i know it's for the best. my sanity and health are too precious to me to jeopardize for a few hours of super-imposed "fun". we've had some memories, that bar and i...and i'm pretty sure we could have had some more...but i guess the sad realization is that i'm not strong enough to simply go and not indulge...and so my dear, we must part ways...

know that i will think of you often, and not hold anything against your structure...maybe one day i will be stronger to at least walk through your doors once more, and share a dance under your flashing lights...but as all good things must (sometimes) come to an end, so must our time together...

here lies reflections; 2000-2007

r.i.p.

Britney Spears - Gimme More (Official Video)

2007-10-05T14:35:00.001-07:00

the long-awaited video for brit-brit's comeback single; gimme more...love the stripper pole idea; long overdue, however i wish it didn't take up the whole video...oh well, as perez said; we weren't expecting much!!!

don't worry mizz spears, the gays still love you!

xoxo

2007-09-28T17:06:00.000-07:00

AUTUMN OF...

teaching, the beginning of careers, teachers, andy warhol prints, wedding bells, soon-to-be-born babies, newly renewed love for the green goodness, loving what you do, "gimme more", britney's (barely-there) comeback, brad pitt as the hottest daddy in the world, yellow tail red wine (merlot to be exact), "cold as fire baby, hot as ice", gays getting married, the most rockin' halloween ever, warm sweaters, teaching children to tie their shoes, the new marilyn monroe art exhibit at the art gallery of nova scotia, becoming boring, white stuff, whoring around, loving yourself, the end of myspace, relaxing friday nights, quentin tarantino's grindhouse feature; "death proof" on dvd, lindsay lohan in rehab, fuck rehab, tuxedo's, FEIST IN CONCERT!!!!!, just wanna go that extra mile for you, the hills, prank-texting ex-boyfriends who need to have their heads examined and who are hungry for attention cause they're anorexic losers, thinking of moving to new zealand, dreaming of beaches, new star tattoos, kat von d's "l.a. ink", gossip girl, not being anybody until you're talked about, new "survivor: china", cutting your hair, going back to platinum, new kittens, missing your uggs, loving zack effron for all the wrong reasons, newly-renewed subscriptions to seancody.com, porn, porn, porn, wanting sex like there's no tomorrow, sleeping with people we know we shouldn't, miss honey dijon, colette's "push" album, nicole richie's baby, sometimes feeling like you're on the slow bus, knowing better, smartening up, new club monaco "tote bags" for men, dan savage Podcasts, puffing away, trips to the cape, the maritime fall festival, plentyoffish.com, positive thinking, taoism, being obsessed with children's books, missing melissa who's left me for calgary, yoga, tai chi, loving digital camera life, my lil' white fluffy baby, missing my lost little brown eyed boy :( , thinking towards the future, smiling...

Andy Warhol

2007-08-26T16:15:00.001-07:00

the man's a genius

2007-08-26T14:24:00.000-07:00

LAST NIGHT OF FREEDOM...

this one goes out to all my ladies who have either already spent their last night of freedom, or are staring it right in the eyes...get ready for the rest of your lives!!!!

our dearest christina is having hers in less than a week, on the eve a week before the actual BIG day...is she exxxcited, you ask? is she riddled with anticipation? does she have any idea of what she's gotten herself into?

only one way to find out!!!!!

the bachelorette party is definitely the one event that i'm exxxtremely excited for; not that i'm not jazzed up for the actual wedding, but more that the bachelorette party is certainly more up my alley! not only will there we many people from out of town visiting (namely my eilish!!) but it'll be the first time in a long time that our ENTIRE group of friends will be gathered in one place!

you could say it's going to be one helluva party!

the whole idea behind these bachelorette parties is quite interesting. it's like the one night in a couple's relationship where everything gets excused...it's like throughout their relationship, all the "get outta jail free" cards they've been saving up, all get used on this one night!!! they're allowed to have strippers, play dirty games, flirt with strangers, even get free kisses from some!!! and all this happens just mere days before they seal the deal with the person!!! forever...and ever...and EVER!!

does this really make any sense to you???

regardless, it's the one event out of the whole spectacle that merits the award for "messiest evening"...and if i had to give my dear chrissy one piece of advice...it would be to expect the unexpected!!!!

this is your last night of freedom deary...don't worry, you're in good hands!!

2007-08-25T17:43:00.000-07:00

I'VE FOUND A PLACE, WHERE WE CAN BOOGIE...SO CUT A RUG UP TONIGHT

i think the change in weekend plans is the biggest adaptation i've had to make, now that we've entered this new stage in our lives. a few years ago, last year even, it was a given that friday night we were going to shake things up in this silly litte town and fuckin' dance the night away...

saturday mornings were filled with greasy brunches, and giggle-filled phonecalls and visits where we laugh about the previous evening's events and debacles...all in anticipation of next weekend, when we get to do it all over again!!

but now things have changed...a concept that is becoming more and more apparent as the days go on. things have been changing for some time now, but i don't think i notice it as much as i do on the weekends when what we used to do has never seemed more like a thing of the past...

long gone are the booze-fueled nights on the pacifico dancefloor...long gone are the random make-out partners...long gone are the one night stands and dirty pictures of pierced penis'...

but what if i wasn't done yet? what if i haven't had my fill? what if i haven't left the dancefloor? do i have a say in all this change?

did anybody ask me if i was ready to move on and let everyone do the same? did anybody ask me if it was alright for them to ruin our lives by settling down and getting hitched and ...don't even get me started...getting *barf* pregnant??????

well at least if they're going to ruin our lives i'm glad i have pretty rings to look at...

2007-08-13T07:30:00.000-07:00

DRACO GOODFEATHER

according to my bestfriend (facebook.com) if i were to be a stripper my name would be "Draco Goodfeather"...now is that a stripper name, or what???

i recently saw lindsay lohan's new movie "i know who killed me", and being the trash-addict that i am i was instantly intrigued by the role that miss lindsay took on. it's been a while since she has led a pg-13 lifestyle, so it's about time that her movie roles caught up with her!! i don't know about you, but i had had enough of her silly little "disney-style" flicks...she's a hard-talkin', cigarette smokin, coke-snortin', hAArd-partyin' little booze hound!!!! and it's about time her movie roles started reflecting that!!!! haha!

sorry, that was my little lindsay speal!!

but back to the more pressing matter; when we were in montreal a few months ago, we were in a strip club (one of many we visited on our little trip!) and i found myself sitting back and pondering what would force someone into a career such as this one? what would instigate a girl to mount a stage and dance erotically to music while dirty perverts stick dollar bills down her g-string? how is it possible for a girl to consider a life as a stripper to be a smart choice? and more importantly, is this a last resort???

but then i got to thinking...what's so bad about being a stripper? what is it about being an exotic dancer that society has deemed to be so despicable? what is it about dancing (with a little bit of integrity) around a pole night after night while celebrating your own personal beauty and power as an invididual? sure, some may say it's a tad bit sleezy, and seedy...but you gotta admit it's totally hot!!!! it's sexy, and mysterious, and dangerous, and ultimately powerful.

those girls (and guys) can command attention when they're up there on that stage doing their thing, and all eyes are ultimately on them. they're desired, lusted after, and fantasized about.

the more i consider it, the more i think i would totally strip if i was a girl! it's not degrading, it's empowering! this is your body, and as long as you do it with a little bit of respect, why not flaunt what you got???

in montreal, strip clubs are everywhere...and the girls were amazing! and i should know; i got a personal dance from one and even gave her a 5 dollar bill with my teeth!!! those girls were smokin sexy, and knew exactly what they were doing!!

i say live it up ladies!!!!!

hey, you gotta pay the bills somehow, right?

2007-08-04T14:11:00.000-07:00

i guess it just wasn't meant to be...thank you all for your NON support;

dear russel,

i'm very sorry and a tad bit embaressed that i have to write you this email, but i am going to have to back out of adopting the puppy from you. after moving back to halifax from maine, i had no choice but to move in with my parents until i finished my student teaching and found myself a job...

hence my problem...i'm extremely displeased with their decision not to allow another puppy into "their" house...but alas it is their house. i considered paying you the entire fee for the puppy, and asking you to hold him for me for a few months, but that didn't seem fair, to you or to the pooch himself.

i have already sent you my 100 dollar deposit in the form of a money order, and after confirming to you that i was going to take him, i understand that that $100 deposit is rightfully yours, and i won't be asking for it back.

all i do ask is that in the future if our paths are to cross again, that you would once again consider me as a worthy "parent" to one of your adopted puppies.

once again i am extremely sorry, and hope that you are able to find a suitable home for the little guy quickly...there's a whole world of worthy possible pet owners out there, and i only hope that one of them finds your newspaper ads!

thanks again,

2007-07-31T17:00:00.000-07:00

THE BROWN ONE...

my little family that i have begun building over the past few years, has suffered a loss in the last few months...as many of you all know about already...and while just as many of you also know, it has been a loss that i has forced change upon myself as well as those around me...a little face i woke up to and slept with every night for 4 years is now only a still image that stares back at me from many a photograph that i surround myself with and reflect upon...and whom i will remember for every day of my life...and whilst i know his little beautiful soul is at peace, his departure has left a small hole in my heart that yearns to be filled.

my beloved will never be replaced...to even contemplate the idea would be impossible...but i know he would want myself as well as my darling jet to be happy...as well as not alone. even while little harley was alive and well, i always knew i wanted to add to my little family. out there there are many a little puppy whose life i know i could enrich if only they would join me and my white furry son in this little world we live in.

many people will tell me it's too soon...many will say i should wait...and many will probably say that i can't afford it...but in reality neither one of the original situations i was in when i decided to adopt my animals were feasible at the time...and you know what? they turned out to be the best decisions i have ever made.

life doesn't always make sense, and things won't always fit properly...we'll always do things some will tell us not to, and we'll always end up in binds that seem unfixable...but the truth of the matter is, all things work out in the end...and a decision that i hold so dear to my heart can never be wrong...especially when it comes to love...

i think a part of me will always unconsciously flip to the classified section of the newspaper and peer at what pets are up for adoption...after all it's exactly this way that i found my dear jet...and recently, as i was flipping through that very section of the newspaper, i came across a man who is looking for a loving home for the three little darlings seen at the top of this page...

they're 3 little chihuahuas, who need a good home...

if i had my way (and my little beach-side cabana that i plan to have in new zealand someday) i'd take all 3 of them under my wing and give them the most wonderful life ever! but for the time being, until i find that little cabana in the sun, my affections are drawn to the little one on the left...

is it right? is it too soon? can i afford it? should i wait? i'm honestly not too sure...all i do know right at this very moment is that i want to help them...and above all i want to love them more than anyone else could...

i think harley would be happy...and i hope jet would/will get along with him...what do you think?

2007-07-31T16:39:00.000-07:00

HERE WE GO AGAIN

well the other night while out on what was supposed to be "a night on the town", three 20something's sat on a concrete slab and took a look at where life has taken them.

while trying to avoid a sad and unfortunate confrontation, alas one of the 3 opened their mouth and things were said, and tears were shed...

but all was not lost, and a better realization surfaced as the 3 friends took a step back and realized that this whole debacle, as silly as it may seem to the outside world, was in fact important to them...but not nearly as important as the friendship around which their meeting was based.

i know i've spoke before about just how much different this year has become than the last, and about how different I AM now as opposed to then...last year we were celebrating change, and going-away parties...this year we're celebrating 'weddings' and other such unions...and as harsh a realization as it may be to come to terms with the fact that we are all "growing up" and "moving forward"...at the same time it's not so bad!

for things will only get more complicated, and things will only progress further, and things will only keep testing our bonds...and the only thing we can do as friends, is concentrate on keeping those bonds strong...no matter what life may throw our way.

this year it's weddings, maybe the next it will be children...but the people i fell in love with oh so many years ago have always and will always remain the same, and ever dear to my heart...

i celebrate your choices my darlings, and wish us all to remain true to ourselves!

congratulations again...

2007-07-26T07:08:00.000-07:00

POOR LINDSAY...

k, seriously this girl has got some ingrown issues...i mean come oooooon, how can someone her age with so much money get stopped twice in like a few months for the same offense??? i mean what the fuck?!~?!

lindsay, let me give you some advice...next time you get behind the wheel of a car whilst inebriated and with a suspended licence, REMOVE the cocaine from your pocket dumbass!!!!!

and the thing that gets me the most is that she's freakin' super ass rich; you're telling me that she can't afford to have a personal chauffeur cart her ass around whereever she goes?!?!?

regardless this little hollywood starlet needs to find herself some help in getting better...her career depends on it! (even though her new movie opens up this weekend...let's see how it does, shall we?)

lindsay we wish you well

2007-07-13T10:05:00.000-07:00

POSH AND BECKS

fuck i can't get over how hot these two are...it's not like they've just gotten together or anything, but I MEAN LOOK AT THEM....it's like there's a 3 orgasm minimum to even cast your eyes on them!!!!!! move the fuck over brad and angelina, cause posh and becks are on their way to los angeles (america....)

apparently david beckham has signed a 25 million contract to play for the los angeles galaxy soccer team (football in their home land)....which is just bollocks if you ask me...i mean, cooooome on????? he's obviously worth 10 times that amount, right??? haha! just teasin...

and in the wakes of a spice girls reunion...does anybody else smell a photo opportunity?

for more scorchin' pics of the orgasmic duo check out W magazine's new august 2007 issue on stands now!

2007-07-05T13:06:00.000-07:00

THE GREEN INITIATIVE

having grown up in a hippie style home, i've always had a profound and deep appreciation for the environment, and respect it just as much. those who know me are probably laughing right now as they know that i don't particularly enjoy "sleeping outside" (i.e. camping) or even the mild hike up a mountain...but that doesn't have anything to do with my love and adoration for our dear sweet earth, and my devotion to hereby celebrate everything it has to offer, as well as protect what it has given us.

after completing an entire year in maine where our social studies and science curriculum has been focused primarily on "climate change" there's no denying how pressing an issue it is, and how over-due all this attention to it is. i'm not here to preach my kiddies, but i would like to share a few things yours truly does in his day to day life that has the earth and it's preservation in mind. and fyi, these are just little everyday things that you can also do at home, at work, and while outside amongst nature.

check this out; from the moment i wake up in the morning to the moment i go to bed, here are the little things i do to conserve energy/water/reduce fossil fuel emissions/protect the environment from other toxic emissions that are harming our dear planet:

1. every time i leave a room i turn off the light; it's hard in a 3-story house compared to a one level apartment, but i'm doing my best.

2. i am investing in biodegradable doggie bags with which to pick up after my pooch; plastic bags and other such unnatural sacs end up in landfill sites and never decompose.

3. i take short showers/baths, and never leave the water running when i wash my face/brush my teeth or shave. something that would be even better to get into would be to even start brushing my teeth while in the shower!

4. for my morning commute, unfortunately i cannot walk (the most environmentally friendly way to travel) but i do rely on public/mass transportation; as silly as the bus can be sometimes, it still reduces c02 emmissions by cutting down on the ammount of vehicles are on the road every morning! and most buses these days actually run on biodiesil fuel which is cleaner. people who drive by themselves to work every morning, then home and back during lunch, then home again at night are polluting our atmosphere and depleting our ozone layer...so walk a little more if possible, ride a bike every now and then, or car pool with others going your way if you have to. fossil fuel emissions is the leading cause of climate change in our society today, and it's also among the most easily preventable.

5. my family and i eat only organic vegetables; they are pesticide free and do not harm the environment when cultivated.

6. i am a vegetarian; decomposing animal flesh in the wild releases methane gases into our atmosphere. DON'T EAT MEAT!!!

7. i always bring my lunch in a reusable fabric lunch bag, instead of a plastic bag that is almost guaranteed to end up in the garbage...and then of course will gather dust in the landfill sites.

8. i try to stay away from buying food that comes in non-recyclable or non-reusable (i.e. wasteful packaging). this one is not always easy, especially since most of today's microwaveable dinners sold in the supermarkets come wrapped in plastic for days...but it's something useful to keep in mind.

9. when my family and i go to the grocery store we use the newly "trendy" greenbags to carry our groceries.

10. every lightbulb in our house (except for one or two that still haven't burnt out yet) in one of the energy saver lightbulbs that will not only reduce electricity bill costs, but also use less energy over all while still illuminating to the utmost capacity. they are a little bit delayed when you flick the switch, but beneficial to say the least.

11. we recycle and compost religiously.

12. i believe in using renewable energy sources whenever possible (although living in the city does present a hinderance to such uses).

13. we don't cut down trees; deforestation releases carbon dioxide into the atmosphere. planting trees and keeping plants in the house (which we do both...seriously) actually releases oxygen; plants and trees breath in carbon dioxide from the atmosphere (thus cleaning it) and releases oxygen as a by-product of photosynthesis.

14. we drive a low-emission vehicle. hopefully will one day own a hybrid or a vehicle that runs on vegetable oil.

well there you have it folks, i could probably go on but you get the idea. every one can do these things, and if we all put them into our daily routines, then we will really be able make a difference...not to sound like an after school special or anything...but i digress!

GO GREEN!!

2007-06-30T19:14:00.000-07:00

RELATIONSHIP REHAB

fuck i'm ready for it...i don't know if i thought i'd come back to halifax and it would be so much easier...did i think that there would be a whole new flock of boys i'd never met waiting for me when i got back? did i think that things would have changed that much? or would there just be the same group of degenerates (half of whom i've already slept with) that there was when i left????

that's not fair...i should take that back...but i did think it, so i'm not erasing it...

i swore to myself that the addictions i left here would not find me again when i got back...i swore that thing would be different (and don' t get me wrong, they are different...which is a good thing...) but on the same lines as that i swore that i wouldn't repeat or find myself snagged by things previously experienced and previously tired and tried...

and i'm stickin' to it...

2007 has been deemed my relationship rehab year...and i'm stickin' to it...26 has been an eye-awakening year...and i'm stickin' to those revelations...coming back for a little while to where i was born and bred is going to be an individually empowering time where i complete my training to become the professional i am going to be...no matter what

2007-06-22T14:33:00.001-07:00

HALIWOOD

well it has been a week or two since i've returned to halifax, and things are slowly returning to the familiar.

not familiar in a bad way, but more so in an envigorating and rejuvenating way.

you know how most people tell you that you start to appreciate what you have only when it's taken away? well i'm here to tell you first hand that it's TRUE!!

i found that since i was living in maine, it was the small things i found myself missing. for instance, sitting in starbucks, going to chapters to peruse the new titles, trying out a new restaurant, going to the movies...you know, simple things that the people of this fine city (myself included) take for granted!!!

well i'm here to tell you that living in fort kent maine for a whole year has opened up my eyes to what was there in front of them the whole time.

will there be things i'll miss about maine? you betcha!!! my list includes

1. buying a quart of smirnoff vodka for 12.99

2. buying a 5 litre box of wine for 13.99

3. having a 24 hr irving across from my place that sells liquor till 1 a.m. daily

4. the 30 degree and sunny weather that occurs 5 out of the 7 days in the summertime.

5. not having to pay for cabs EVER, cause everything is in walking distance from my apartment. (even though i love my cabs...usually...)

6. the cute border guards that put up with us when we walk across the united states border at 4 a.m.

god bless america

trailer i know who killed me trailer official lindsay lohan

2007-06-21T19:21:00.001-07:00

this is the trailer for the new lindsay lohan thriller; now i know some people don't appreciate the hAArd partyin' little lady, but i loves me some l.lo!!! it looks entertaining and a tad bit dirty...check it out!

2007-06-17T14:42:00.000-07:00

THE QUEEN

no, not me bitches...GWEN STEFANI!!!! i almost forgot to tell ya'll about mine and holly's trip to montreal to see miss gwennie!!! all in all the entire trip was fantastic; highlights (before the concert include) me laying down on a stripper stage with a $5 bill in my mouth and having a hot blonde stripper rub herself over me, kiss me, then take the bill from my mouth...

another would be holly gettting a private dance from the same stripper; hey at two songs for 10 bucks, it's a steal!!

another would be the 200 dollars i dropped in FCUK in like 20 minutes...

and yet another would be myself and holly getting lost after going to 3 different bars, meeting two randoms on the street, going to a "porn bar" (you know they ones with the little booths that you can slip a dollar in and watch some porn?!?), then going to an after hours club until 5 am...which is how we got lost!

the concert itself was the most amazing thing i have ever witnessed; i laughed, i cried (literally bawled), i danced the whole time, i screamed, and i sang along to every song...she played most of all her 2 solo albums, and had the harajuku girls along for the ride, complete with their own male counterparts. she finished off the whole concert with a ballad version of "the real thing" from L.A.M.B, which she dedicated to her little kingston! she even did a tour of the whole arena and even went up into the stands to sing "cool" which she invited us all to sing along.

she looked even more amazing in person, and her voice was to die...all in all, she was a goddess! it was an amazing trip, with an energy in that arena like i've never seen. i was in total awe the whole time!

MattInc talks Vegetarian

2007-06-17T14:41:00.001-07:00

you actually have to "EAT" to consider yourself a vegetarian mattinc...that's probably mean of me to write this on my blog, but hey...IT'S MY FUCKIN' BLOG AND I CAN WRITE WHAT I WANT...alright i take that back...this is the dude i met in maine when i was there, and just stumbled upon his 'video blog'...i don't know, call me crazy but if i had a video blog i know i'd try and make it, oh i don't know, INTERESTING...check him out for yourself, but in my opinion he fails at doing that...see for yourself: www.youtube.com/mattinc

2007-06-16T15:33:00.000-07:00

DON'T GIVE UP ON ME

dear friends,

i know by now you may have given up on me and my blogging abilities...seeing as how i haven't blogged in forever...but those of you who know me know that i had good reason...

without going too far into the sad details, i'll at least mention that the keefe family suffered a loss when my darling harley passed away a few weeks ago. everyone knows that that little chihuahua was my life, and there will be forever a piece of myself missing now that he's gone to that soft little place in the sky...xoxo my sweet....

in lighter news, i recently finished my stint as a temporary american as the last day of school came and went. it was a fantastic year, filled with many memories that i won't soon forget. and with school finishing, that means that i'm all the closer to becoming a teacher!!

on that note, i got my first placement for september; a grade primary class in fall river! i'll be there for two months, and then in another grade for another two months at a different school. it's easily observed that i can't freakin' wait!!!!!!!

so for the summer i'm back in haliwood, living in the previously dwelled basement in my parents suburban home. the dmv will be my provider of moola, and the pool in my backyard will be my new digs...

so there you have it folks, you're all caught up! (more or less). i hope i haven't lost too many of my loyal readers over this self-induced hiatus of mine...but rest assured my friends...I'M BACK!!!

love,

Boom Chicka Wah Wah - Funny Axe Commercial

2007-06-06T17:03:00.001-07:00

last one i promise!

Amp'd Mobile - Bus Commercial

2007-06-06T16:54:00.001-07:00

saw this while in montreal...can't get enough of "you...shake your junk"

priceless

Not For Women

2007-06-06T16:50:00.001-07:00

don't hate me for not posting lately...but i just had to share this video with you: it's a viewer created l'oreal commercial...and it's hilarious!

enjoy!

britney spears rants

2007-04-26T14:47:00.001-07:00

this just in-
haven't heard from our lil' (possibly ex) pop superstarlet lately...but here's a little video from x-17 where brit brit rants to the camera about "how good the world is, ya'al..."

it's worth a look...just hang in there after the picture slideshow, the interview takes a second to pop up!

enjoy!

Feist - 1 2 3 4

2007-04-13T18:50:00.001-07:00

perez hilton hit the nail right on the head; this song is amazing, and the video is fuckin' trippy!

enjoy!

2007-04-07T14:28:00.000-07:00

DRUNK GURL

is it possible after all these years to have an alcohol tolerance that is getting smaller? cause either it was the smack i received on the head last night that caused me to be foolishly drunk off not even a whole bottle of wine, or my tolerance is getting smaller!!!

whatever the case, pray it doesn't happen again.

off topic, yet even more exciting than my drunken excursions; pete wentz (the emo love of my life) admits openly to this month's "advocate" magazine, that he enjoys kissing boys!!! (and we all scream from a little place inside of excitement!!) he is quoted as saying that anything above the waist is fair game...however he has yet to experiment totally in the "penis" region...

but we can all dream, now can't we!

2007-04-06T07:34:00.000-07:00

GIVE

i meant to blog about this a long long time ago, but better late than never i always say! now i know some of my dear precious readers look at company's like the gap and scoff; whether it be for not wanting to support pretentious sweat-shop company's or simply because their style doesn't appeal to them. but i'm here to tell you that one of those 'some-what' pretentious-not-for-everyone companies has taken on a new initiative that is one we all need to be supporting.

gap has a new line of clothing and accessories (called gap red, in case you haven't caught on yet) that's contributing a large portion of the sales to help fight aids in africa.

here's the blurb:

Gap (PRODUCT) REDTM is about great products that can help make a difference for Africa. As a global partner of (PRODUCT) RED, we’re contributing half the profits from Gap (PRODUCT) RED sales to the Global Fund to help women and children affected by HIV/AIDS in Africa.

a little fyi for ya: did you know that 70% of people infected with the hiv virus live in sub-Saharan Africa?

there's a whole lot more all of the world could be doing to help put a stop to this global crisis (that's a little more close to home than most of us would believe) but i applaud companies like the gap who have stepped up to the plate and started an organization such as it's red line.

products range from t's, hoodies, belts, sweaters, and other accessories. so next time you stop on in to the gap, check em out! and help researchers in their quest for the cure.

peace

2007-04-05T19:37:00.000-07:00

someone once told me, that they avoid drama at all cost in their lives...but you know what? drama...is life!

drama is relationships, and anniversary's, and kids, and outings, and special occasions, and birthdays, and careers...it's everywhere!

why would you want to skip all that? why would you want to live a complication-free life? and even if you did, how could you?

the people who avoid drama, are the ones who are afraid of confrontations...and the people who are afraid of falling, and the people who are afraid of getting hurt...

but when you take a look at the big picture, to avoid these things, means not living! for in retrospect, they are unavoidable! the most we can do as adults in this sometimes crazy world, is never give up what we love, play the hand we've been dealt, and accessorize the outfit we've got!
only then will we be happy!

Imitation of Christ Feature

2007-04-04T18:09:00.001-07:00

2007-03-28T14:08:00.000-07:00

VACATE

well i'm currently vacationing in the big sunny city!!! and by sunny i mean that it's not minus 40 degrees out in halifax!!!

so far it's been a lovely vacation; much drinking, much debauchery, much smoochin', much hangin'!! i.e. exactly what i wanted/needed!

the fort treats me good most days, but it does start to itch at me after a while...baiscally it makes sense that we have a little mini-vaca every 4 weeks or so, seeing as how most of us are dying to get away by that point! but you all know that i loves me some school, and i am totally content with the choice i've made...even if it meant that i had to live in the arctic for a year!! just kiddin'...

it's good to keep my ties with halifax strong...since it is the place i've been able to call home for the majority of my life! and by having these strong ties, it guarantees that i'll always have a place to come back to...that is if the rest of the world shits in my face!! (which hopefully won't happen!!)

just checkin' in bitches, take care and wish me luck!

keefe out

2007-03-20T19:17:00.000-07:00

MY GIRL

we all know that i like to check in on my girl jenna from time to time...(been a fan of her work for longer than the normal gay boy should be a fan of a female porn star). these were some pics taken of my babe (lookin' mighty svelte, i might add) recently at the ed hardy fashion show in l.a.

this look in the second pic on the right is not my fav look of all time...those boots make me want to heave, and the jeans don't really do her any justice...but since it's mizz jameson, i'll make an acception to my 'heaving rule'. but only with a little advice; perez and i both agree; we miss the curves jenna!!! you always look fantastic, the gays just like seeing you healthy!

take care gorgeous!

2007-03-16T07:45:00.000-07:00

SPRING OF...

no more fuckin' snow, + temperatures, warmth, no more heat on in your houses, cleaner air, wearing less clothes, sunny days, over-sized sunglasses a la nicole richie spring collection 2007, buying dvd's off ebay, harajuku lovers, GWEN STEFANI CONCERT MONTREAL MAY 29TH!!!!!!!!!!!!!, telling drugs to fuck off, smoking joints, booze, booze, booze, patios, march break, almost being done school, the lorax by dr. seuss, lusting after william sledd, cruising 15 year olds in the "pick and save" and adding them to facebook without knowing they were only 15 and finding out after they were already added, not having boyfriends, tasha, protecting the environment, the 3 r's, worrying about climate change, veggies, facebook, facebook, facebook, "burn it up" is the new "that's hot", hemp cream from the body shop, throwing away all your leather, animal rights, david and goliath, writing children's books for school, the new fallout boy album, dj tiga, not buying products that are tested on animals, dinner and drinks with ex-boyfriends, getting your life together, almost being a teacher, star tattoos, iPod nano's, thinking about moving to New Zealand, drew barrymore's new movies, www.alluc.org, blonde is the new everything, walking more, jogging, still not smoking, blacking out after a night of drinking, poking people, myspace is dead, dirt on the fx network, flicks, having butter behind the concession stands again at the movies, layering your butter on your popcorn, celebrity autobiographies, scary movie "dead silence" and "the return", hostel part 2 coming out in june, "grindhouse" by tarantino and rodriguez, WEDDINGS, eating the vegetarian plate at wedding receptions, christina saying goodbye to being single, peace and love, unity, hippie thinking, hugging a tree, dumb blondes, having 10 pairs of sunglasses and wanting more, only working a little, rescue remedy, saying 'fuck you' to panic attacks, the new single by p.diddy and keyshia cole "last night", boys wearing girls jeans, not being the old man at the club, but going anyway...sometimes, careers, vonage phone, wanting my cell phone back, having all the simple life dvd's, missin' you, thinking about being a whore over vacation, crossing the U.S. border with a pill in your pocket, then never doing it again, walking puppies, dog pj's, pears, being yourself...

2007-03-16T07:43:00.001-07:00

HAPPY SAINT PATRICK'S DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

have a shamrockin' good time!!

muah!

2007-03-16T07:29:00.000-07:00

well this week has been a little on the unorthodox side; to make a long story short an evil from my past which i thought had long since reared it's ugly head, decided to rear it once more...what followed was about 3 full days worth of panic attacks so bad that i thought the world was ending...i managed to come away full tilt, but not before i freaked out in my social studies class...

after pulling myself out of that black hole, and deciding to turn over a new leaf...a more professional, grown-up one, one that doesn't include those pretty little pills that i can't seem to get away from, or any other illicit substance of the sniffing sorts...i even changed my hair!! i know i can say that i'm going to behave till i'm blue in the face and it won't mean anything...but i feel a change in my bones. i always prayed that something would happen that would scare me out of this way of life that's got such a choke-hold on me, and i think this past weekend was finally it. for anyone who's ever had panic attacks, knows exactly what i'm talking about...all the air seems to escape from the room, and you can't see past what you're feeling at that exact moment...

moving on, after that fiasco my beloved harley had to be taken to the vet...basically it turns out he has some sort of herniated disc (sic) that requires him to go on a pretty little pill (no, not the same kind) to make him better...a steroid "anti-inflammatory" of sorts that will make him all better. i cried, he cried, but he's on his way to recovery. looking into that little dog's eyes, i'm continuously reminded of just what i'd do for him...he's my life, and i can't bare to see him uncomfortable, or in pain...i would truly do just about anything for that little dog! (and jet too, of course!)

so it's the weekend, and you know what that means; 2 whole days of drunken debauchery ahead of us!! and this weekend is a little unique seeing as how it's st. paddy's day!! coming from an (almost) irish upbringing (keefe isn't far from o'keefe) i'm planning to celebrate with my true irish lovely "carolyn"! she's throwing a party at her place in canada that's sure to be a jolly good time! so as i bid you all a fantastic weekend, and a happy st. patrick's day, i hope you all drink a green beer, and have a toast to the irish!

top o' the mornin' to ya

Grindhouse Final Trailer

2007-03-14T10:33:00.001-07:00

i think i just came a little...watch for yourself...

2007-03-09T06:58:00.000-08:00

SAVE THE PLANET

This semester (and last for that matter) in my social studies and science classes, the running theme has been "climat change".

In the news lately, scientists are finally admitting man's role in the planet's vast climate change we've been experiencing over the past decade or so. (fyi; did you know that 2005 was the hottest year in recorded history??)

By man's role in climate change i'm referring to the fact that the human race is quickly being blamed as the sole reason we've been experiencing the growing epidemic of global warming. Deforestation is becoming a problem more than ever; pollution rates are soaring; more and more chemicals are being dumped in the oceans than before, and aerosol products are destroying the atmospheric ozone layer.

for more on the topic and the seriousness of the issue i suggest you all watch al gore's docu-drama "an inconvenient truth"...i guarantee it will scare the living shit out of you...especially since it basically blames some of the world's worst environmental catastrophes (umm, hurrican katrina anyone?) on US!

those of you who don't recycle/compost, or those of you who litter on a regular basis/use your vehicle too much/cut down trees/eat meat (sorry that last one was a personal one) GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER PEOPLE CAUSE WE'RE DESTROYING THE PLANET...

we're being taught that as future educators to the next generation, it is our utter responsibility to teach them about the dangers of living a frivolous lifestyle (i.e. one that includes the above mentioned activities...)

"the lorax" by dr. seuss pic above was written in 1971 and centers around deforestation; basically the lorax is a little creature who speaks for the trees (since they have no voice of their own) and is trying to educate the factory workers on the dangers of cutting down and destroying our planet's forests. like i said it was written in 1971...that was 35 years ago people, and now today this is still just as prevolent an issue as ever before!!!!! we're obviously doing something wrong!?!?!?!?! (i suggest you read this lovely little book by dr. seuss; or watch the movie...it's on youtube.com...just search for "the lorax" it's only about 30 minutes long, and i seriously believe that watching it will open up your eyes to just what man is doing to the planet.

think about it.

Mad TV - Commercials - Ecstasy

2007-03-07T18:16:00.001-08:00

OMG, tooo funny...

2007-03-02T15:27:00.000-08:00

101 things you may or may not know about me
1. I am extremely paranoid sometimes.
2. I can be really insecure.
1. my dogs are the most important thing in my life.
2. I have one of the biggest addictive personalities of anyone I know.
3. I like to drink a little too much.
4. I can’t wait to be a teacher.
5. I think eating meat is just wrong and disgusting.
6. I’m completely and totally 100 % addicted to tattoos; I have 9 already and don’t see myself stopping anytime soon.
7. I want to live in New Zealand on the beach forever, or on a ranch with dogs and horses in Texas, al the while teaching 1st graders.
8. I’ve had sex with around 80 different people.
9. I’ve had a major std scare, (but am totally fine now)
10. I’ve done more drugs than could fit in a bath tub.
11. I’ve eaten a pill that I took out of the toilet once.
12. I once stayed up for 3 days on ecstasy.
13. the thought of doing #14 again makes me want to cry.
14. I can be really hard on myself sometimes.
15. my friends mean more to me than they will ever know.
16. I lost my gay virginity to a 35 year old british doctor/body-builder/dj in the parking garage outside of a club in Halifax…on the hood of a car.
17. I’ve had more one-night-stands with nameless faces than I can even remember.
18. I think anonymous sex is HOT, even though I can’t bring myself to do it anymore.
19. I don’t have any shame left.
20. when I start lying I can’t stop.
21. I lie to my parents all the time without even knowing it.
22. I can be completely and totally vengeful towards people who fuck with me.
23. i’m a little bit dramatic.
24. I’m a total bottom, and love every second of it.
25. I’ve slept with 3 girls before I turned to guys.
26. I’m attracted to chests, more so than cocks…but I can appreciate a beautiful dick as much as the next guy.
27. muscles turn me on more than anything else.
28. I like to be spanked really really hard.
29. I’m in love with anal beads.
30. I masturbate at least once every day.
31. I love to dominate in bed.
32. I’ve only ever had sex on e once…and it was with a stranger.
33. I can’t wait to be boring.
34. I have a fear of being that old man at the bar.
35. i’m addicted to jerks.
36. relationships make me insane.
37. I secretly think I have A.D.D or am a little bit crazy…shhh…
38. I check under the bed every night before I go to sleep.
39. I used to flip a coin sometimes; heads I was gay, tails I wasn’t…in other words I didn’t have the easiest time coming out to myself.
40. I never wanted to be gay…but now I couldn’t imagine life any other way, and thank goodness I am every day!!
41. I love myself completely and utterly.
42. I love the way I look, and I’m happy I’m teeny tiny…aka heroin chic.
43. I eat like a fuckin’ cow, but just don’t gain weight…so sue me!!
44. I really want to learn how to play the piano.
45. disease terrifies me to my core, to the point where I lose sleep over it.
46. I am in love with being in love; and I can’t wait to find it again…or for it to find me…
47. I am an eternal optimist!
48. I sing all the time; in the morning, under my breath, making dinner, shopping, in class even…life deserves song!
49. I prefer to remember things with my own head than with photographs.
50. all I want in a relationship is to find someone who can love the me that I love…
51. I believe in love at first sight, if it feels right.
52. I really want to get married one day.
53. I’m undecided on whether or not I want kids…right now I’m happy with teaching them.
54. my favorite drink is a cosmopolitan.
55. I want to marry mr. Smirnoff.
56. wine is god’s gift to man.
57. I don’t really like other gay men. (as friends I mean…)
58. women are for friendships, men are for fucking.
59. I’ve never been a top.
60. there are three important things in life; clothes, compliments, and cock.
61. I’m addicted to trash; magazines, music, movies…you name it!
62. I could wear flip flops, board shorts, and wife-beaters all day everyday.
63. electronic music is in my soul.
64. I’m a hippie at heart.
65. I’m a huge animal rights activist.
66. I do everything I can to save and protect our planet.
67. I hug trees whenever no one’s looking.
68. I feel at peace when near the ocean.
69. I can be much more serious than some may think.
70. I’m a Taurus to the core.
71. I always get my way…always.
72. I’m the only one that matters most times.
73. I wine to get what I want.
74. I don’t usually let anything stand in between me and what I want.
75. I’ve had a threesome with a boy and a girl.
76. I’ve slept with one of my friend’s roommate and ex-boyfriend without knowing it.
77. I’ve used my grandmothers Christmas money to buy coke.
78. I’m very two-faced sometimes.
79. I believe laughing is truly the best medicine, and do it as often as I can.
80. all I want out of life is to have fun and be happy.
81. I believe that if you’re bored, you’re doing something wrong…
82. I’m equal parts devil and angel…although sometimes one sticks out more than the other.
83. I both love and hate drugs.
84. my father’s an alcoholic and I fear ending up like him.
85. I’m a total mother’s boy.
86. I’m boy crazy.
87. I deserve to be a V.I.P
88. I think Paris Hilton and I were separated at birth.
89. I secretly think I have a long-lost twin brother (even though I’m an only-child.)
90. I secretly want to dress like a goth.
91. I shave my chest and under my arms.
92. I’ve never been to a tanning bed…but have had many many bad self-tanning experiences.
93. I sweat when I’m nervous.
94. I wear girls’ jeans and carry girls’ bags.
95. I’m pretty gay…like super gay…and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
96. I love to write; stories, poetry, letters, rants, raves…and want to someday publish a novel.
97. I think I may have missed my calling as a stylist.
98. I’m retardedly obsessed with celebrities.
99. I eat a huge bowl of popcorn every night.
100. my idea of a perfect date is dinner, drinks, a movie, and buttery popcorn.
101. my favorite designer is louis vuitton.

2007-03-02T07:02:00.000-08:00

HOSTEL 2

so eli roth and quentin tarantino are giving us another look into their sick and twisted view on the terrifying world of hostels...by giving us a second dose of every traveler's worst nightmare.

this is the teaser poster, featuring a naked and decapitated bijou philips...the teaser trailer doesn't give you much more insight, but is still worth a gander for those of you who loved and hated the first one as much as i did. (and by hated, i mean it scared the living shit out of me and made me never want to stay in a hostel again...)

the second time around promises us more of the same torture and demeaning behavior that the first one alloted us...a must for horror and quentin fans alike.

you could say i'm a little excited!!

wooo hahahaha

2007-03-02T06:59:00.000-08:00

some people look better when they don't smile...

Beautiful Liar Beyonce ¬ Shakira

2007-03-01T20:16:00.001-08:00

hot, hotty, hott...shakira and beyonce...who'd a thought?!?

2007-02-28T13:41:00.000-08:00

I'M FEELING YUMMY HEAD TO TOE

well i'm not sure if amidst my excitement i was able to share with ya'll the good news or not, but if i haven't let me take this opportunity to say:

I'M GOING TO SEE GWEN STEFANI IN CONCERT MAY 29TH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

you could say i'm a little stoked.

yes, miss gwennie kicks off her 'sweet escape tour' next month (april) in vegas, she's going to be joined on the road by Akon and Lady Sovereign in a massive tour that's sure to leave everyone wanting more, more and MORE!!

i'm going to be able to see her in montreal at the bell center in may (yup, just after my big ol' 2-6 birthday!! happy birthday to me!!!)

this is a moment i've been looking forward to for a very long, looooong time! i've been a devoted gwen fan since the early days when no doubt was merely a garage band memory! so stay tuned as the day gets closer and my excitement grows!!!

2007-02-27T17:57:00.000-08:00

WHAT'S HOT RIGHT NOW?

doggy pyjama's, being mean to exes," just jack" (the band...they're fantastic), "feist" (another girl band from nova scotia...download "inside and out"), pink on boys, williamsledd.com, over-sized white shield sunglasses for spring, moving to the states, upside-down bandanas (on guys and girls), melt-downs (a-la-britney), "music and lyrics" with drew barrymore (aka the most romantic movie of the year), "factory girl" (based on andy warhol's muse), dj tiga, dj dan at reflections (even though i'm going to miss it), black iPod nano's, drinking wine on patio's instead of beer in the spring/summer, day-trips, gwen stefani's harajuku lovers line, gwen stefani's concert/new cd/style/husband/baby/l.a.m.b, pride 2007, blonde with brown foils, FACEBOOK, FACEBOOK, FACEBOOK, www.alluc.org, ditching myspace, being enigmatic instead of skanky, not giving it up on the first date, cancelling dinner dates and making them want it even more, working on the side, teaching, eating healthier, not ditching uggs even though pamela anderson told me to, celebrity biographys, pop art, not wearing leather or fur, louis vuitton's spring collection, go-go dancer's in bars, diamonds, messaging on facebook instead of texting

LOVE

2007-02-27T17:49:00.000-08:00

WE COULD TAKE A RIDE

yes we could...but are you worthy? it struck me this weekend while i was in halifax and jacked up at reflections; looking around at the boys of that city...cute, flirty, buffed, bronzed, blondes, brunettes, hot styles...

BOYS ARE TOYS...

and i'm resorting back to that way of thinking...no more of this relationship shit...no more of those sleepless nights...

i'm so much better than that, and no one's gonna take advantage of this little twink again...from now on, i'm going back to my old way of thinking; i'm the one whose going to do the using.

somewhat off topic, but anyways: i was on dlist.com recently (since apparently i joined up after a alcohol-fueled evening) and the only guy on there from fort kent was the guy i already fucked the shit out of...

2007-02-22T13:49:00.000-08:00

EL PIANISTO

my momma and i went to see this lovely 'feel-good' flick the other night as part of our mother/son-bonding experience of me being home for a while! and i think it goes without saying that i LOVED/ADORED/CAN'T WAIT TO OWN IT ON DVD seeing as how i live and breath drew barrymore...but besides that, the movie stirred a little something in me, and that was the "musical instrument" bug (which i thought had long since faded away!)

before you go hatin', yours truly used to (believe it or not) play the saxaphone...until i quit because i couldn't stand the feeling of wood in my mouth...the wooden reid that is, perverts...(stop giggling)

but not to toot my own horn or anything, but i was pretty damn good; my fingers moved oh so quickly over the keys, and i had a knack for picking up new tunes by ear!

but this time around, it wasn't the saxaphone that peaked my interest, it was the piano!! i know it may sound silly for a 25 year old who's never once been taught to play the piano would suddenly have an interest in learning, but i do!!

actually i have always had a deep passionate appreciation for the piano, and have always dreamed of one day being able to play. and watching this movie just renewed that passion that i thought had faded away.

and it's at this point in my life, where i'm beginning to realize that my passion could soon one day become a reality! i've been thinking of how and where i want my home to be (when i officially get a teaching job) and one thing i now know i want to have in that home, is a grand piano!!

i can just picture myself entertaining guests and leading them in a pop star inspired sing-along infused by cosmopolitans, around my sexy black grand piano!!

now, i just need to find someone to teach me to play...

2007-02-21T14:21:00.000-08:00

HIPSTER

well i've totally fallen in love with girls' jeans...yeah, yeah...i know! it's pretty bad when you're a boy who's SO heroin chic (aka slim) that he doesn't fit into men's jeans and has to resort to the fairer sex's denim selections to find something that better suits his physique...but c'est la vie, eh?

actually, i'm very much ok with it...i've even gotten used to the judgemental/surprised look from the american eagle girls as i immediately proceed to the women's side to pick out their jeans!!

anyways, for any of you out there who are in the market for a new pair of jeans; let me reprise my past role of "salesboy extraordinaire" and give ya'll a little shameless plug on these amazing jeans.

this fantastico cut is for those who like it LOW...super low, at that. with the lowest rise on a jean that i've ever tried on, be prepared to show a little skin when you sit down/bend over/stretch, etc.

it fits tight through the thigh area with a 19" flair at the ankle for that little bit of extra-room that 'boot-cut' just can't give ya. there's something about this specific super-low rise that just makes the butt look amazing!

CHECK EM OUT!

2007-02-19T09:00:00.000-08:00

i'm not even going to comment on the horrors of what's happened to my dear sweet sweet brit-brit this past weekend. let's just say that i'm completely shocked and concerned for this sweet little girl lost.

and is not ironic that this has all happened just after i wrote her my amazing letter voicing my concern for her future.

regardless, i think it's a travesty and beyond a sin that she has fallen so far and so fast. no matter if you're a fan of ms. spears or not, you can't help but be touched when another girl falls prey to the temptations of a hollywood life...

britney, i hope you find your inner peace and resolution with yourself...our thoughts are with you...

2007-02-15T11:52:00.000-08:00

for some of you who have not seen my personal pics of the "fort kent crew" as i've donned them, here's a little pic of some of my closest friends i've made since being up here in the middle of nowhere....just so you can rest assured, that your little lovely is in good hands!

in case you were worried!

2007-02-15T11:51:00.001-08:00

2007-02-15T11:44:00.000-08:00

Dear the Britney of yore,

first of all, how are you? how are you feeling? have you purchased any new underwear lately? just kidding. i'm writing to you dear britney and speaking on behalf of my people in a collaborative manner...my people, being of course "the gays".

you see the thing is miss b, we're a little concerned. we understand that you've been going through a really rough time lately, and we just wanted to be that collective hand that reaches out to you in your time of need and reassures you that everything little thing's gonna be alright!

we're behind you brit-brit, and always have been.

after the birth of your second son, things got a little bad for you...the temporary insanity of your marriage to k-fed aside, there was the incident of almost dropping sean preston in new york...the seemingly endless nakkid-crotch pictures...and the short-lived friendship with paris...

all in all, the media have not been very kind to you lately...but we're here to tell you that you've still got a friend in us! we're eagerly anticipating your longly awaited "2007 REVIVAL" album...and as they say; the world is waiting with breath that is baited...or something like that...

now don't disappoint us!

stay strong dear britney...we're always behind with you, and by your side...take care of those sons of yours, think "fantastic dance album", and stay the fuck away from "federline" types...

love always,

the gays.
xoxo

Hobo With a Shotgun

2007-02-15T11:42:00.001-08:00

is that cadence i see??? loves it

2007-02-15T11:37:00.000-08:00

i started off this year with thoughts of myself...and lately those thoughts have become solidified.

2006, as i've said many many times, was the official year of "drama". and i'm so over it. drama in relationships, drama at work, drama with friends...and above all drama with my inner self.

now without sounding like an after-school-special, i just wanted to write and say how much fun i'm having with MYSELF lately.

my friend sarah called this time "healing time", and you know what? i can't help but agree with her.

I'm totally digging being single...and the more i think about it, the more i realize that i just don't want all that 'boyfriend shit' right now...i don't want to have that pit in the bottom of my stomach all the time, and i don't want to have that worrysome feeling all the time; where is he? does he like me? what's he thinking?

fuck THAT!

right now, i'm having a good time being with myself, with the puppies, and with my friends...

boys need not apply right now...until i'm ready...

unless your brad pitt, of course...but that goes without saying!

2007-02-15T11:36:00.001-08:00

do you love it?

2007-02-06T15:28:00.000-08:00

DESSERT

a wise woman once said, 'dessert is the whole point of the meal'. an even wiser woman once said 'let them eat cake'...and even though the latter 'lost her head', both ladies had a point.

i have always found myself a part of the 'salty' loving group, opting out of a delectable creamy chocolatey dessert in favor of something salty, crunchy and flavorful. but lately, (i blame the absence of nicotene) i have found myself craving sweets more and more.

no one can deny the allure of ice cream, chocolate, cream puffs, cheesecake, or even simply cookies...but there has always been something about SALTS that teases and tempts my palate, until i inevitably give-in to the temptation and indulge in the crunchy goodness.

what divides the two groups? are there those out there in food land who enjoy both salty and sweets the same? or does everyone fall into one or the other category? does it have something to do with how we were brought up? or is it simply a personal preference?

salty or sweet...what do you desire?